


The mermaids grove

by KimsyWims



Series: Kirkwall shorts [7]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Accidental Bonding, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anal Sex, Anger, Angst, Angst and Feels, Awkward Kissing, Awkwardness, Blood, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, First Kiss, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Trust Issues, but also fluff, custom clashes, emergency surgery, injuries, like so much fluff, mermaid au, sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-05-28 14:24:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 32,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6332611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KimsyWims/pseuds/KimsyWims
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The mermaids grove was said to be a place where mermaids came to find their mates according to legend.</p><p>Anders thought it was utter bullshit, mermaids were nothing but fictional creatures belonging in Varric's pirate novels. That's of course until the day he's proven wrong by a white haired beauty of the seas. </p><p>A mermaid knows it's match at first touch. Many goes lifetimes without finding who'm they seek and die alone, others find their match as children. Fenris never had any high expectations over finding his match and he sure isn't happy to find it in a land dweller.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter one: Dawn Lotus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Mermaids grove is meant to be the home of the mermaids, or so legend say. Isabela and Merrill are eager to find these mermaids, Hawke just enjoy the view of his two girls splashing around in the clear water and Anders has his eyes on an entire different price.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, am I doing another mermaid AU? Ah well seems I am. I hope you'll enjoy it, I am not sure if it will be very fluffy or very angsty or somewhere in between! :)

The mermaids grove, (or that's what the locals called it since no one could actually pronounce the old Tevene name for it) was said to be a place where mermaids came to find their mates according to legend. Sometimes they also was said to come to socialize with humans or elves. It was said that if the sea favored you the mermaid would grant a boon, those who were truly blessed would even be grated the ability of breathing under water. 

Utter Bullshit according to Anders. No magic in the world could just change a person's lungs into picking up the tiny fragments of oxygen in the water, it had been tried and failed a multiple of times. More than one skilled mage had drowned that way during the years. And there was no proof of mermaids ever having existed and even less that they would exist in a pond in the nature preserve of Kirkwall.

 _ **If**_ mermaids were to be found somewhere, that somewhere would be deep in the chasms of the seas where no one else could venture. And Anders still didn't believe anything that looked even remotely person like would be able to stand the horrible pressure out there. According to him and the modern world's science, mermaids were nothing more than myths. 

It was just like those crazy tales and myths about there being two entire lost islands out there where men double the size of normal people lived and governed. Not to forget that people also claimed that these people had horns. People who claimed they had seen it were often half mad sailors who had been shipwrecked a week too long in the fogs of the Northern seas.

Though, no one ever seemed to listen to Anders when he said something was a waste of time or a bad idea. _"_ _Don't go down in the deep roads Hawke, there are Darkspawn." "Don't trust Bartrand Hawke, he seems shady." "Don't trust sister Patrice Hawke." "There is no such thing as actual Cooties. Don't stick your dick into a healing potion because you're horny. Don't punch walls, don't trust the chantry and don't piss on ancient altars."_

Isabela had just laughed and said spoilsport when he pointed out mermaids didn't exist. Anders had been content on letting them to it on their own, he had work in the clinic with Justice, but Hawke had pulled him aside and begged him to come. Or blackmailed him to come, affectionately.

 

> _"Please Anders don't make me be the only sane person there?" The bear of a man had whined unhappy. "I love them both but this constant nagging about mermaids is absurd."_
> 
> _"Hawke, I have work to do. Potions to be made, bills to be payed and I have to buy a new laptop to the clinic so we can actually pay the bills." Anders had protested with his arms across his chest._
> 
> _"I bet there are herbs there you can use. Free herbs and I will pay for the laptop."_
> 
> _"Fine... You better help me pick a lot of elfroot."_

The darktown clinic was a free clinic that ran on donations and a few founds from the government that allowed for a very meager pay for the people who worked there which meant he couldn't say no when someone offered to support by buying them a laptop. But Anders wouldn't give it up, not when his magic did good and they changed people's lives for the better. Not to talk about how it kept the templars off his back.

Since it was a free clinic they couldn't rely on modern medicinal treatments. They couldn't buy in a lot of antibiotics or manufactured painkillers, especially since these things were controlled by the chantry. What they could do however was to use the art of potion making and brewing their own medicinal potions and poultices. It was an art that could only be preformed of spirit healers and the Dalish these days, the rest of the world having lost the sense of how to connect to nature.

At least today was a good sunny day, being out in the nature was even rather comfortable. It was a needed break in his work and by the time they had come to the mermaids grove his bag was filled of herbal goodies that would help a lot of people, including Hawke who constantly got into trouble involving injuries. Without costing anyone even a copper. 

Isabela and Merrill had wasted no time and were already in the water of the pond. Dressed in bikinis they must have worn under their clothes. Hawke was smiling as he watched them and Toodles (Hawke's mabari) Was happily searching for what Anders assumed to be the largest stick in Kirkwall. He himself had even pulled his knee high boots off and rolled up his jeans to his knees, tossed the tight leather jacket with feather pauldrons to the side. 

An old friend of his had given him that jacket as a joke some years back but he had to admit he bloody loved that thing and had no plans to stop wearing it anytime soon. No matter how much his friends joked about him being a feather apostate. Not that he was an apostate of course, he had done his years training in the circle and was a fully functional member of society.

"So how will splashing around in a pond help  you find mermaids? Wouldn't they flee from your splashing?" He asked and arched a brow as he dipped his feet in the water. It wasn't cold, but not exactly warm either, it was comfortably in between too cold and summer water okay cold.

"They aren't startled fish Anders, they understand. My clan always said they were just like us, only without legs." Merrill chirped happy. 

"Fine, fine I won't ask. Could some of you reach that dawn lotus?" He asked as he spotted the white flower.

"Nope! You will just have to jump in with us hot stuff." Isabela purred with a laugh. 

"It's not so cold Anders, bring Hawke, I want to see him take his shirt off." Merrill said with a little giggle. 

That someone so innocent like Merrill was a bloodmage was hard to fathom at times. The odd elven wiccan was just too... cheery and joyful all the time. But Anders knew better than to say anything. Hawke loved her fiercely and would take any battle for both Merrill and Isabela if it came to it. Anders also had to admit he had never seen Merrill use bloodmagic for bad things.

He shook his head and folded his jeans one more fold up over his knees and slipped carefully down in the water.

The tricky thing about this pond was that the water was clear in some places, green and murky in others. It was also impossibly uneven, where it was just up to your knee at one step the next it could just open up to suddenly be at your waist, so Anders had to move very carefully or he'd end up with wet clothes and wet hair. 

It was slightly unnerving not being able to even see his feet in the water as he slowly made his way to the lotus. He knew there was no leeches, poisonous or dangerous fishes, no crocodiles or any dangerous animals in the area, but his imagination was really good at making up things that wasn't there. Hawke beginning to hum on the damn jaws theme was not helping at all to keep the mild panic at bay and he quickly pulled the little pocket knife out to work the flower loose. 

"I saw something!" Merrill said from her and Isabela's side of the pond. 

"I saw it too kitten! That way." Isabela answered eagerly. 

Anders rolled his eyes, they probably had seen a fish, but their silliness did make him calm down a little as he put away the pocket knife again. But then he saw something, or he thought he did at least, a quick flash or white moving too fast for a fish in the water and the next thing he knew, he was below the surface. The pitched scream he had let out made him accidentally swallow water but before any damage had time to happen strong arms under his armpits pulled him up again. 

He coughed out the water he had swallowed as his rescuer dragged him back towards the rocky shore. Anders barely even registered that it was Hawke as he was too focused on staring wildly at the water and try to help best he could to get them out of the damn water.

Someone or something had grabbed his ankles! He was absolutely one hundred percent certain.

Hands, that had felt... not quite like hands but clawed and... he wasn't certain how to describe it really but he knew it had been something with hands. Human like hands but wrong. Hands that had pulled his feet from under him but had let go the moment Anders hit the water. That and his lower legs felt strange, a tingling wobbliness as if he had been sitting on them for far too long but more... pleasant.

Merrill quickly joined them on the small rocky shore and Anders still stared wildly at the water. He saw Isabela wade around where he had just stood, holding a dagger in her hand that he had no idea where she had kept hidden in just her Bikini. But nothing happened, the water quickly returned to the serene flat surface it had been, only disrupted by Isabela's movements. 

"Anders what happened?" Hawke asked carefully.

That's when Anders realized he was half laying in Hawke's lap and quickly scrambled to sit up on his own with a shiver. If it was from shock, fear or his cold wet clinging clothes he wasn't sure, maybe all of the above at once. Merrill looked at him where she sat on her knees in front of him looking immensely worried and Hawke (just as drenched, clothes and all as himself) was looking concerned. It wasn't helping at all.

"Something grabbed me." Anders choked out. "Right there..."

"Are you sure." Hawke said calmly but still firm. "Seaweed is really nasty and makes me panic all the time. That's why I don't like to bathe unless it's a sandy beach."

"There is nothing here." Isabela called as she waded back to them, the knife again hidden somewhere on her persona. 

He stared at Isabela.  Had it just been a dose of his imagination? Some seaweed wrapping around his ankles and an already panicked mind making up something not there? But... it had felt like a hand, two hands, one on each ankle, he was sure of it. And he had seen something white in the water just before it had happened, it wasn't just his brain making things up, his legs were also tingling. 

But he didn't want to seem like an idiot either... What if it had been nothing and he came out like a total loony even if it was just to his friends. He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face and closed his eyes. He just wanted to go home and pretend nothing of this ever happened and maybe make sure his legs were fine.

"I'm sorry... I really shouldn't have watched that  horror movie yesterday." He said instead forcing a shaky smile to his lips.

"Oh horror movies are uncomfortable. I was skittish about bathing an entire summer wen I first saw Jaws." Merrill agreed solemnly.

Anders smiled lightly. Yes Merrill was a blood mage but maker bless her kind heart. It felt a little better hearing that instead of merciless teasing. Isabela smiled and crouched down holding over the white lotus he had tried to pick and Anders took it with another sigh. Maybe it had been imagination, he knew there was nothing with hands living in the pond, or in the waters of Thedas. 

"Carver refused to bathe for a month after we saw that movie." Hawke said and chuckled. "I was more freaked out by the Sphere and the whole octopus thing." 

"You people are such wusses. Now, crocodiles, that's terror on both land and water." Isabel said with a laugh. 

Anders just smiled slightly. The more they talked the more he could make himself believe that he had just imagined it all and when they packed their things to go home he was certain that the flash of white he had seen in the water had just been a reflection of the sun and his legs was no longer feeling odd. 

If only he'd known how wrong he was, that his life had just changed. Forever.


	2. A tropical fish in the south

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fenris side of the story.

The sanctuary pond was a very beautiful place with it's surrounding nature of green soft trees that had ranks of leaves hanging all the way down in the water. Soft rocks of which several practically screamed about being comfortable spots for sunbathing were littered close to the edges of the shallow parts. The bottom of the pond was filled of pretty soft smaller rocks, several of them shifting in pink and white making the water reflect very prettily in the clear water. 

It was a fine spot no matter preference for a merperson. If they preferred playing or socializing there was a large area for that, if they wished for sunbathing and relaxing the rocks by the sides were both warm and comfortable, but it was also suited for lurking in the murky green water by the edges. Lurking was something every young guppy loved to do. Lay waiting in murky green water before pouncing out on unsuspecting fish or other young merpeople.

Or at least that was what the pond had once been for. 

Once upon a time the merpeople had spent long days in the pond, not frightened for the land dwellers that at times came visiting. But then times had changed, the land dwellers had gone greedy and tried to slaughter all merpeople for their tails. Every mer knew this tale and every mer had kept away from the land dwellers through generations for a thousand years. The land dwellers had proceeded to forget but the merpeople never would. 

But the pond was still a place humming of ancient magic, an ancient longing. The spirits of the water, the trees, the rocks and nature surrounding it was mourning the loss of the life merpeople always brought with them. The spirits mourned like a man would mourn a severed arm and the fishes inhabiting the pond now was but a twitching in fingers long dead. 

It would always be a home to the merepeople, an abandoned home but a home nonetheless. Young merpeople were drawn to this place but none entered, none dared to bring the spirits to hope for life once again... none dared to possibly bring wrath upon themselves by waking the spirits only to abandon them again. None, except for Leto. 

Fenris often swore loudly over the recklessness of his younger twin and equally often scolded him for his behavior. Leto loved to swim into the pond, he'd use the narrow passageway several meters under the water and spend his days as the mer of old had. His twin would lay in the sun on the comfortable rocks or he'd watch the land dwellers from the murky parts of the water while they went on about their business.

Fenris dared not to follow his twin.

Not because the possible spirits dormant there, but because of the risk of getting caught. Even if they were almost exact copies to each other to shape, they differed in color. Not their skin, they both had a dark olive tone to their skin and they possessed the same green wide orbs for eyes, green as the jungle trees of Seheron. But everything else differed in color.

Leto had a dark brown hair that was ideal to make him blend into Tevinter's long muddy rivers. His tail was a bright green, almost yellow when the sun shone upon it, black streaks making it blend into the seaweeds. His frilly fins were bright orange like on the peacock basses or the large Tevene catfish and the whole thing dotted with a very faint pattern of leopard dots. Leto had always had it easy to make friends with the local basses and catfishes because of the resemblances. 

Fenris on the other hand had shock white hair only matching the merepeople who lived in the cold lakes of the Anders. It was a convenient hiding mechanism if one lived among snow ice and seal, but not here in these waters where everything was green or brown or blue. His tail was a deep blue where several scales reflected almost silver in the light, his own frilly fins shifting softly into an aqua green. But the largest difference between Fenris and Leto were all the white markings that covered Fenris from his tail fin to his chin and forehead. 

It was the markings of the deep sea merepeople and could be activated to glow. Usually the deep sea mers only had a very small portion of their bodies covered in these markings, a brand over their tails or their arms, some covered their faces with them, but never their entire bodies. The markings were made of lyrium and they didn't come natural. 

A young deep sea mer would touch a raw lyrium vein for only a second before they would be pulled away from the source. Some parents even cut a small pattern into their guppies skin or tail before the scales had hardened to guide the lyrium to the right places. But Fenris hadn't had anyone to pull him back until it was too late, he didn't remember much except for that it hurt and afterwards he had been told he had depleted the entire vein of lyrium. 

It was something that should have killed him, something that almost _had_ killed him. But instead it had robbed him of all his memories. Luckily he had only been a young guppy at five summers so he hadn't lost his entire childhood and Leto had been there to tell him about every place they had played. All Fenris could remember from it was that he had woken up with a new pain in his body that never went away. 

But so many years later he had grown used to it. It wasn't pleasant, but it wasn't distracting either. Alas, looking the way he did, sneaking wasn't very easy in shallow waters. After the incident with a land dweller when he had been in his late teens to young adult, they had fled Tevinter and it's shallow rivers and dams to the south where there was a lot more places to hide for him. 

But since they were still from Tevinter originally they were still hot tropic mers. That meant their tails were slimmer but longer than their southern brethren. Their bodies were lanky instead of big and muscled and there was a limited amount of fat in their tails. They were built for speed and shallow waters, to be able to move agile through shallow waters and avoid getting caught in rocky streams that were more land than water. 

The merepeople who lived in the south were large and muscular, they had more fat and shorter tails. Before they had left Tevinter Fenris nor Leto had ever seen a mermaid with a killer whale tail or a merman with a shark tail. They had had a very nasty encounter with a siren lady who had greatly resembled a barracuda. That time Fenris and Leto had been very happy about their small and speedy sizes. 

However, hot tropic merepeople were by nature  drawn to shallow water and warmer ponds. The sanctuary pond that already had a magical pull on their people was nearly irresistible for the siblings. Well, not Varania, most days she wouldn't even say a word to either of the twins, she'd just swim away to search for a mate in one of the local mermen that swam these water, she wanted nothing to do with the pond or her brothers. 

Fenris who had suffered harm under land dwellers before was by experience weary of shallow waters, traps and nets. Especially if he knew that the land dwellers was often seen in the area. But Leto had no such weariness, his twin couldn't resist the urge to press the limits each and every day by returning to that damned pond no matter what Fenris said. 

Some days Fenris would lay by the underwater passage to the pond and just silently watch his brother. Making himself ready to do anything to protect his foolish twin. He couldn't bear thinking about Leto being taken, it hurt to much and he would never allow what happened to him once happen to Leto. He would give his own freedom up in return for his brother's if he must.

Today had been one of those days where he had watched his brother swim in the pond, playing with a fish. Then the land dwellers had came. At first Leto had kept hidden properly, far away from the two women splashing around in the water while laughing. Then to Fenris' horror he had seen his brother creep closer and closer until he was almost touching them. 

That's when one had shouted she had seen something and he had seen his brother been cornered. Any second now and they would actually see him and not just a streak of orange from the tail. Fenris was ready to charge in and kill, but that would bring attention of more land dwellers without a doubt. Luckily, a second option stood to the other side of the pond. 

One of the land dwellers was standing with his odd legs in the water by some lotus flowers, oblivious or ignorant of the commotion of the other two land dwellers. All his brother needed for an unseen escape was a distraction. Before Fenris had time to over think or regret what he was about to do, he dove in and grabbed the land dweller's ankles, giving a hard pull to flip the man over and into the water. 

The moment the skin of his hands connected with the land dweller's he knew. 

He had given up on ever feeling the sensation of a match, but his fingers began tingle madly, spreading down over his arms. The moment the land dweller fell flat in the water Fenris let go and moved away in a hurried speed. He saw the flash of orange that was his brother's tail fin and chased after him to the underwater passage back to the sea. Fleeing the two legged land dweller he had touched.

The tingling in his hands had been replaced by a raging burning feeling, hot and angry as the ancient magic of the soul entwining clashed with his lyrium brands. He he felt dizzy and the way the passage was brightly lit blue told him his brands were glowing on their own accord. He didn't even have it in himself to try to put them out, he just needed to flee, far, far away.

A land dweller.

The ancient sacred magic had picked a land dweller for him? No, he refused to believe that, it was wrong, he had sensed wrong and he would not submit to that magic. He would not submit to any magic, nor the angry burning feeling in his hands and arms as his fate. He couldn't. 

When they reached the other side he dove to the bottom in the speed of a barracuda and clawed at the rocks with his face down and eyes closed. He needed something solid, something real, something he knew. He felt the pain in his hands slowly subduing to a dull throbbing and tried to press down the panic that was raging in his chest.

"Fenris? Brother! You are glowing."

He felt Leto's fingers and hands clutching to his shoulders, trying and failing to pry him off the rocky bottom, or at least turn him around. Fenris was clutching and grabbing the rocks under him tighter and pressed his entire frame harder to the ground to stop Leto from being able to move him, he didn't want to be moved right now because the rocks were cool to his skin and familiar. He ignored his bother's more and more pleading voice for the comfort of the rock underneath his head. 

He was scared to open his eyes. He was scared to see any marks manifesting in his skin over his arms. He was scared that he would be forever bound to someone who could feel his location if getting close enough. He was scared of being owned again, this time by a chain he could not cut unless one of them died. If he kept his eyes closed maybe he could chase the reality away, force the spirits of the seas to understand their mistake and retract what they had done.

"Brother I am sorry." Leto's fragile voice was heard by his ear. "I won't go to the pond ever again."

His minutes younger twin had draped himself over Fenris' back instead of trying to pull him from the bottom. Leto's lanky but still muscled familiar frame eased the panic slightly, enough for the lyrium to fade out. The land dweller couldn't get this deep down. Not even the two legged mages could breath under water and their under water ships were easy to swim away from. 

He shifted around and quickly had his arms full of mer as his brother pressed in  for a rib crushing hug. He soon returned the gesture and bumped his forehead against Leto's while the younger was showering him in apologizes both verbally and physically in how he was moving his tail and cuddled close. 

Merpeople were very expressive with their bodies to show emotions. It differed slightly between the races but were mostly the same basics. Forehead bumps was a show of forgiving and or of deep caring, promises and acceptance. Pushing bodies close but remaining lower down than the other was a submissive apology between two meres who stood each other close. Rubbing one's head to the others was a show of content affection (or trying to get something one wanted).

"I can't... Leto I can't loose you to them." He said quietly and finally opened his eyes, locked them with Leto's identical big green orbs. "The land dwellers are not a kind people, they will kill us for our tails or hurt us for their enjoyment." 

"I am sorry. I just wanted to watch them..."

"Do not go there again." It came out a bit more forceful than he had meant, but it was important.

"I will not." Leto mumbled. 

Fenris sighed because he knew it was a lie. Leto couldn't help going there again and again even if he was almost caught. The pond was like a calling for him, for them both. But he needed Leto to stay away from the pond for a while because Fenris was coming up with a plan. The pond was said to be a place where the spirits would listen, perhaps they would hear his reasoning to the poor match just done by accident. 

"At least not this month. Please brother, just this once?" Fenris asked tiredly. 

Leto remained still for a moment then slowly nodded agreeing to the request and bumped their foreheads together again. It was a promise and Fenris believed it. He had little less than a month to try to sneak back and figure out exactly how to end this bond. A month to try to contact spirits and hope they would not be demons.  

He hoped it would even be possible.


	3. A meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders officially meet Fenris for the first time and Fenris steals a souvenir.

When Anders woke up the next morning it was by a magical jolt surging through him, startling him out of his comfortable dream about kittens.

It wasn't something unusual, since Anders suffered both night terrors and jump scares, something quite common among the people of Thedas. The only difference between mages and nonemages was that for mages; the usual reaction caused them to use magic on pure instinct. It was how he had found out he was a mage when he was a kid, accidentally almost burned his parents home to the ground.

But after (forced) training in the Fereldan circle these burst of magic were nothing more than small trickles of electricity teasing through his body instead of accidentally  burn down the house.

A friend in the circle, an elf named Surana had once told him _"people wake up like that because the dread wolf have been treading in their dreams, mages lash out with magic to keep the trickster god at distance."_ Anders didn't believe it, but it was a nice story he supposed and he preferred it over the chantry's version of demons trying to possess him unknowingly.

Anders just yawned and stretched out in his comfortable bed, buried his head back into the pillows and took a deep breath, tried really hard to chase the dream he had woken up from. Unfortunately once he had woken up, there wasn't a returning back to sleep anytime soon. Another curtsy from the circle, either wake up before the templars come to wake you or get a boot in your face for lazing around.

So, instead of sleeping he reached to his phone and looked at the numbers telling him it was 08:24 in the morning. At least he had gotten some sleeping in time this Sunday. Usually he was up before seven when he had work in the clinic, and for Anders, every minute of extra sleep counted as sleeping in. 

He heard the door creak slightly as it was pushed open and when he turned his head he saw Ser Pounce-A-Lot strut into the room in his usual fluent and somewhat sassy cat way. The orange tabby eyed him in a  _'Why have you not come up to feed me yet'_ way before he jumped up on the bed and stretched out on Anders' back. Anders should probably have complained about Pounce's claws scratching over his back, but he was so used to it that he couldn't even bring himself to care.

"Hello Ser Pounce-A-Lot, are you hungry?" He cooed softly. "I've got a can of mackerel you can nibble on." 

Ser Pounce meowed loudly and Anders sighed with a smile and stretched out comfortably on the bed before dropping his head back into the pillows. Even if he was awake he could still use his Sunday off to laze around in bed for a while longer.

But Pounce seemed to have other plans as he jumped up on Anders' head, purring so loudly Anders couldn't even hear his own thoughts. "Ah fine you rascal! I surrender!" He called out to his cat in defeat. 

Ser Pounce jumped off him with his usual grace and Anders sat up to stretch out one more time before kicking the blanket off... and regretting it the second he did. From the right ankle to his knee, long intricate dark blue tattoos were patching his pale skin in a swirling pattern. Tattoos he was damn sure he hadn't had when he went to bed last night. Sure they had gotten drunk after the scare at the pond, but not _that_  drunk. He'd have remembered if he'd gotten his bloody leg tattooed!

The tattoos were made in an unknown swirling pattern from his knee and all the way out on his foot where the tattoos branched out in dark blue lines to each toe. The whole thing was very gracious and had been very pretty had it not been a sudden surprise on  ** _his_  **leg. 

He prodded the tattoos with some magic, trying to heal it and press the ink out of his skin but there was nothing there to heal. Those markings weren't inked into his skin or painted on him, they were part of him. He forced down the urge he had to scream and panic in favor of a deep calming breath to think out what to do next, who to ask that would possibly know about suddenly appearing tattoos that weren't really tattoos. 

The answer was easy. Either Justice would know, being a fade spirit that man knew a lot about odd things like these. Or he'd have to ask Merrill, maybe this was some kind of elven magic, like with their facial tattoos or something. Or thirdly, this was some kind of practical joke from Isabela. Out of the three, Justice was the one he enjoyed speaking with the most and the one he trusted the most. 

It seemed his Sunday off would be spent in the clinic anyway, what a surprise. 

★☆★

A few hours later Anders wasn't entirely sure how to describe what had happened. 

He had taken his car and begun driving on the usual road towards the Darktown clinic but then by a fork in the road he had taken a left instead of going right. He had stopped thinking and just drove because he had...  ** _known_** where he was supposed to be and it wasn't at  the clinic. In fact it wasn't in the city at all. When he ad reached the goal of his unknown route he found himself back by the nature preserve and by the pond. 

He couldn't explain why, he just knew that was the place he needed to be for some maker forsaken reason. 

He had tossed his jacket off, then pulled off his shirt since he was alone and the sun was hot, and then had just sat on a rock by the water for a long while before he realized just what he had done instead of getting help with his problem as he had planned.

But instead of getting up and back to the car he decided to stay. Anders had just rolled up the legs on his pants and dipped his feet and legs into the crystal clear water. He figured, now that he had made himself the trouble to get there, he might as well take the time to relax on his day off. Justice would still be  there tomorrow but his day off wouldn't.

Anders was a bit puzzled over how little he cared about the new tattoos on his leg since he had been near to a panic attack about them earlier. But it just didn't seem important. Just like it wasn't very important that the water around the edges of the pond that usually were green and murky today was crystal clear, giving Anders a full view of the entire bottom of the rather large pond.

Just like he didn't care that anyone could see his chest and back covered in old ugly scars as she had taken off his shirt, something he never did outside no matter the time of year. He just couldn't find any compulsion urging him to put his clothes back on, a strange feeling that he decided to revel in now that he for once in his life had it. A feeling of contentment over who'm he was and his place in life. 

He sighed to himself and closed his eyes, leaning his head back to enjoy the late spring, early summer sun and the birds tweeting in the bushes. It was a very nice place, perhaps he should come here more often just to relax his minds. Lately his mind had been far too occupied of work and important boring adult issues, this was a lot more to his younger self's liking. 

He laughed lightly at the thought of how a younger Anders would scold him for having become the man he was today. In his teens all he had cared about was himself, living his life and sex with a lot of people. All he had ever wanted was to be allowed to throw fireballs on fools and be free from the circle's clutches. Maker, all the times he had got into trouble...

He jumped a startled and was pulled out from his idle thoughts when a hand landed on his knee and when Anders opened his eyes he was staring into emerald green eyes so beautiful it hurt. It was an elf if the ears was anything to go by, long pointed ears poking out from under long white hair that clung to the elf's shoulders. How on earth the elf had swam up on him without Anders even hearing it was a mystery for the ages. 

"Andraste's knickerweasles! Are you trying to give me a bloody heart attack?" He said and blushed sheepishly. 

He realized he probably should be bothered by a complete stranger touching him but somehow... this elf didn't feel like a stranger. How odd now that may sound, it felt like Anders had known this elf forever even if he had no idea what even his name was. The elf however just looked at him with his pretty emerald eyes and Anders slowly realized the elf looked... slightly wrong.

The hand that laid on his knee had a fine webbing between each finger and the nails looked very sharp and pointy, as if they were meant to grab and tear living things to shreds. His eyes widened when he realized the blue and silver in the water behind the elf wasn't just the sun making the water seem funky, it was a bloody fish tail, a fish tail in the size of half a person!

Anders sat entirely still, body tensing up by fear, he really didn't want to upset whatever it was that was so close to him by pulling away, but at the same time, he knew. He knew that's the thing that had flipped him over in the water yesterday. Perhaps it was here to finish the job, to drown Anders and then eat him or something...

"I... please don't kill me." He said quietly, hating how his voice quivered. 

The elf, no mermaid or whatever it was, just tilted his head in slight confusion and Anders swallowed hard. Maybe it didn't understand people language? Did mermaids understand people in the legends? Blast! He really should have listened more closely to Isabela when she and Merrill had been chatting about it yesterday. 

"I'm really not tasty at all but I can cook. I mean I can make you something you can eat that isn't me if you want to."

He was blabbering, he knew he was but he really didn't want to be eaten by some water thing, and he really didn't want to be drowned. Drowning was immensely bad and he still had a lot left to live for. Like... well, there was at least Ser Pounce-A-Lot who needed him back home. Hawke and his other friends most likely would miss him, Karl too, even if Karl had sort of left him to work in Orlais... Ugh! Point was, he wanted not to die today.

Then he noticed something else. The hand that laid on his knee had a very cute icy blue tattoo covering from his fingers up over his elbow in intricate knots and swirls shaping into a cat. He remember seeing something similar when he was just a young boy still living in the Anderfells. He had grown fond of the pattern and his mother had embroider it into his pillow. Come to think of it, that looked exactly as the pattern on his pillow.

"Is that an Ander tattoo?" He asked, all but forgotten that he might become dinner.

Before he had time to think some sense into himself he reached out and stroke his fingers over the icy blue lines, realized there was white lines cutting through the ice blue tattoo, swirling white lines that looked like the new lines on his leg. White lines that also covered this man's entire torso and up on his neck and chin. How could they have tattoos looking just like each others? And why did this man, elf or whatever it was in front of him have a pattern that Anders had on his pillow? 

When the other man pulled back his hand slightly Anders quickly laced their fingers to stop the other from escaping. That tattoo was important and he couldn't even explain why it was important, he just knew it was. There was even a hint of pride teasing in his chest over seeing it. Not that he could understand why he felt either of these feelings, he just did. 

"Can I at lest know your name? I'm Anders." He said slowly and pointed at himself in case the other didn't understand. "Aaandeeers." He said again very slowly then pointed at the other, arching his brows in question.

The mermaid elf looked hesitant, like a teenager worried to get busted smoking behind the school or something and Anders suddenly wondered if mermaids maybe weren't allowed to show themselves by some kind of water living law. Worried that he was the reason this guy would get into trouble and he quickly loosened his hold on the other's hand.

"Fenris. My name is Fenris" The white haired beauty said with a low deep voice.

And with that the hand laced with his pulled away and Anders just stared as the mermaid vanished off in the water in a ridiculous speed. He was just so dumbfounded by the whole situation that he didn't move for at least twenty minutes. He blinked before finally getting up on his feet only to find that his shirt was gone.

Mermaids existed and this particular one had just stolen his shirt... he needed to speak to Hawke. 


	4. Don't feed the fish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders get's a day off and Fenris is a menace.

When it came to it, the conversation Anders had planned on having with Hawke ended up being a conversation with Justice instead. Anders knew that if he decided to speak to Hawke he'd have to speak to Isabela and Merrill as well and he wasn't really feeling to admit to them that they'd been right about the existence of mermaids, nor did he want to hear any loud squealing and squeaking when his life had just been turned upside down.

Not unless it was absolutely nessessary.

So instead of sitting in Hawke's living room, he found himself in Justice's office in the clinic. Leaned back in a chair while holding a cup of chamomile tea. Justice was on the other side of the desk in his office-chair looking as if he was very deep in thoughts. Most likely balling ideas with Kristoff who'm Anders understood it was still in there somewhere. 

He had already shared everything from the trip to the pond yesterday to the loss of his shirt today with Justice. Still quite upset about the shirt since it had been one of his most comfortable t-shirts and wearing just a leather jacket on a sunny day wasn't the most comfortable thing he could do. But he had decided that it had been best to go speak to Justice before doing anything else.

In fact, he had been worried he'd do another odd impulsive thing like driving some other crazy place he shouldn't. Perhaps out in the forest and get eaten by some other fairy tale creature. Maybe a werewolf or a bloody dragon (please let there not be dragons in Thedas and if there was, please don't let Hawke know, the dragon kigurumi was enough). 

"Let me see this marking of yours." Justice finally said and motioned for the desk.

Anders put the cup aside and unbuckled his high boot before rolling up the leg of his pants to reveal the blue tattoo and put his leg on the desk with a sigh. Thinking about it more closely, those lines had the same colors as Fenris had on his... tail. And wasn't that was still odd to even think, someone having a bloody tail. But the similarities in color was just another thing that made this whole mess more odd. 

"His tail had the same color as that tattoo, and the tattoos he had all over his body looked kind of like that but white. Except for that Ander tattoo that looks like my pillow, that one was icy blue." 

Justice had leaned in while Anders spoke, prodding the mark with some of his fade magic and Anders reached for his cup again. But before he reached it a searing pain blossomed up in his leg as if someone was cutting him with a glowing knife, making him recoil violently from the blue light that left Justice's fingers. It of course made him tumble down ass first on the floor.

The tattoo on his leg angrily glowed and flared as if it was on fire under his skin but quickly subdued to a dull throbbing when he sat there on his ass on the floor. Justice just looked at him over the desk as if something very interesting had just occurred and Anders groaned. Sure Justice was a spirit of Justice, but he could still show some compassion couldn't he? 

"Andraste's knickerweasles! What did you do that for!" Anders exclaimed from the floor.

"That is a mark of souls. Ancient magic governed by spirits of compassion and wisdom. There is nothing I can do to remove it." Justice declared.

"A mark-soul-what-now?"

"A mark of souls. That mark is the mark of another individual's soul. If you say you saw something that was linked strongly to you upon the merman, then he is your soul match."

Anders just stared at Justice when the other man sat back down on his chair. Anders himself didn't even bother getting up from the floor, he'd probably just fall back down of shock anyway.

Justice was telling him there was spirits of Wisdom and Compassion that messed with people's lives? For what? The fun of it? Wouldn't people know about this if there was such a thing existing?

"So how do I take it away?" He asked confused. "And how come no one ever told me about this?"

"Such marks are rare in this age, the only one able to remove it would be the spirit who bestowed it upon you. I would suggest returning to where you were given the mark." Justice suggested.

Anders flopped back on the floor and laid staring up in the roof. Perhaps if he wished really hard it would all go away.

☆★☆★☆

Two days. 

That's how long Anders managed to resist the new raging urge to go back to the pond. Justice had kept telling him to go and get this sorted out but Anders was more of the  _'if I ignore it enough it will go away'_ state of mind. Unfortunately he found that he couldn't think of anything other than a blue beautiful tail with white almost silver markings. He simply couldn't get it out of his head.

When Wednesday came, Justice gave him the day off. Or rather, Justice kicked him out of the clinic for the day when Anders for the fourth time had walked into the wrong examination room because his minds were somewhere else entirely. Justice had understandably been worried that Anders would make a mistake with a patient.

Not that Anders' had complained about getting the day off though. In fact Anders rather liked days off, especially since he hand't had many of them while studying in the blighted circle. When he had found himself without the argument that he needed to be at the clinic to work, the pond was like flames for a moth and he hadn't been able to resist.

The moment he was back on the rock he had been sitting at last Sunday, he felt it as if a clear spring breeze had flowed through his head and cleared out all annoying irrepressible urges. That gave him the chance to finally relax, it was a bit like when you realized you had forgotten your lunch just in time to dash back and get it before work.

However, he had learned his lesson the last time and kept his shirt on and left the leather jacket in the car. He couldn't afford more shirts getting lost to the pretty merman, and he really didn't want to loose the jacket.

That was if the other would even show up at all today. Just in case Fenris wouldn't, he'd brought a book about spirit healers and a nice cheese sandwich for lunch (even if Ser Pounce had stolen most of his cheese when he had looked the other way).

As an after thought when he'd been ready to leave his apartment he'd grabbed the three apples he'd bought some days earlier. He had a feeling he'd maybe want them later and usually Anders had good feelings and hunches about things. Except for when it came to that bloody pond and the constant need to go there.

When he got to the damn pond, he didn't waste time on waiting around, but instead removed his boots and rolled up the pants to his knees and slipped his feet into the clear water at once. It was a warm day and he intended to enjoy the time he'd been given off. Very soon he had lost himself in his book in an interesting chapter of why and how spirit healers always had that certain connection with both spirits and the fade. 

When he was as most glued to the pages he felt a soft wet hand touch his leg. It brushed over the tattoo he now had there before it stopped on his knee. 

This time instead of jumping startled and shout, Anders steeled himself. He pretended the merman wasn't even there, just pretended reading his book as if nothing was up. He had made up a plan on his way to the pond, a simple plan of  _'Do like you'd do with an easily startled cat.'_ Which meant ignoring the merman until the pretty man felt more comfortable around Anders and maybe wouldn't dart away after a few moments.

The theory soon proved out to be true even in practice as he hard the merman huff before there was a slight nudge to his knee, then a light squeeze. Anders elected to ignore it and kept pretending he was reading his book, until softly clawed fingers slipped in under the book giving a small tug. It was hard not to smile over his victory but Anders managed fairly good. 

Anders gently lifted the book from the wet webbed fingers, ignoring the water stain as he carefully put the book aside to look at his companion. Those green emerald eyes locked with his own and he gave a small smile to the white haired beauty hoping it was reassuring enough not to scare the other away. He doubted cooing at this man would work as good as with cats, so he refrained. 

"Hello." He said instead, keeping it as calm as he possibly could through the sudden giddiness that washed through him. "Gonna dash away this time too? Because if so, I intend to continue my reading." He said cheery. 

The merman huffed an adorable little disgruntled huff again and sent him an angry glare as if Anders had personally offended him and his entire family. But he didn't leave and Anders counted that a success. 

At a closer look, Anders noticed the torn stripes of cloth wrapped around Fenris' arm and recognized it as his shirt. Or rather, what was left of his poor ripped apart shirt. He knew he shouldn't think of it like that, but it was kind of like seeing someone in his shirt after sex and the giddiness he felt was quickly spreading throughout his body and he felt a bit like a kid bouncing around in a toy store.

"I got something for you. I don't know what you eat but I just had a feeling." He said and reached into his bag. 

The merman quickly retreated back to the water. The only thing Anders saw of him was the small glinting of the tail and the white long tresses swaying about three meters away from him. Anders silently wondered if maybe something had happened to the handsome merman before or if this was just the usual skittish way Fenris' people had around humans.

In the end he decided it best not to dwell on it and instead picked up the three apples and put one close to the edge for Fenris to grab and left the other two on top of the bag out of reach. He saw the merman eye the apple suspiciously but made no move of getting closer so Anders picked his book back up and returned to look in the pages blindly. 

There was no actual reading happening of course, he was to excited over what the merman might do. Hoping the merman would enjoy the apple enough to maybe ask for another. That's why he had put the other apples out of reach, it wasn't the morally nice move perhaps, but he desperately longed to hear that deep rich voice again. He just wanted Fenris to say anything at all.

The reaction from Fenris came a lot quicker than Anders had anticipated and he soon felt Fenris hand on his leg again, steadying the merman as he grabbed the apple. Anders glanced over the pages and watched the merman taking the tiniest of nibbles of the fruit, chewed, waited then quickly began crunching down the entire fruit in record time. Core and all. 

Anders let his book down and watched the merman with curiosity. Waiting to hear that voice again, but Fenris had other plans. Quick as a viper Fenris used Anders' legs as leverage and strong arms practically hauled the merman up flat in his lap. Before Anders had time to process what happened, the siren slipped back into the water again, leaving only a large wet patch on Anders' pants. 

In the few seconds Fenris had been in his lap and Anders had been too stunned to move, the merman had managed to snag both apples from behind him and was now looking far too smug, grin and all as he was devouring his delicious apple price. 

"You really like apples huh? I wonder what you would do with a pie." Anders said, aiming for cheeky but coming out more shocked. "Maybe I'll make you a tart for the next time." 

Fenris didn't answer, instead he hungrily licked his lips and eyed Anders backpack and before Anders had time to react the wicked Merman was out of the water yet again, sprawling over his lap. This time when Fenris slipped back in the water he darted off, vanishing completely. Too late did Anders realize Fenris had left along with his bag, house keys, phone and his wallet. 

Anders was just left staring. How the fuck was he supposed to get into his apartment now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is fanart from lovely ! Go check it out! :3 
> 
> https://41.media.tumblr.com/11f531fc5de9285c2531a06ec8642e93/tumblr_o551cacpTW1vormaeo1_400.jpg  
> https://40.media.tumblr.com/a80061110f1ad40d8a22566c9d15b1d4/tumblr_o54sb9pfH81vormaeo1_400.jpg  
> or  
> https://www.tumblr.com/egotisticalvampire


	5. The spirits always have plans.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fenris creates fashion and Leto figures out what's going on.

Fenris wasn't entirely certain why he kept stealing Anders' things. He simply kept telling himself that he needed them, that he only  took them because there was an actual use in have them. The shirt for example was to hide the mark branded to his skin from Leto. And the bag... well, chances were that it would have contained more apples. It was easier to come up with these lies to himself than to accept that he was following some primal urge.

Not that the bag had contain any apples now that he had shook the continence out on the sandy ocean floor. Instead the bag contained shiny metal keys, an odd black square he didn't have a clue of what it was, a purse with a fuzzy land creature filled with green papers and thin plastic bricks, along with other odds and ends. There had been another shining silvery bag with white squares in it.

Fenris had very soon figured the white squares wasn't food but it made his mouth feel oddly clean when he chewed one.

He stacked the things in one  _keep_ pile and one  _junk_ pile. The shiny keys went into the keep pile along with the bag containing the white squares. He found that one of the plastic cards had a picture of his land dweller on and that too went to the keep pile. The rest of the things went on the junk pile except for the bag itself. 

The bag was big, too big for him to carry around, it would only serve to slow him down while swimming and that could be lethal in these waters. But he really  _wanted_ the bag. No, that wasn't right, he  _needed_ the bag, to carry around his new things. The shiny keys weren't to just lay around in one of his stashes and the card with the picture... Leto was too good at finding his stashes and would find it, then ask about it. No, he needed a bag.

Settling in a more comfortable position he set to work with carving and cutting off the two front pockets of the bag with a sharp rock. He also cut the leather straps off and quick and easy made two slits in each of his new mini bags and strung them onto the makeshift belt before using the buckles to strap the belt to the hips of his tail and made sure it sat securely.

Being a merman meant doing a lot of scavenging and the need to be resourceful. If you weren't you wouldn't be able to have nice things and all mer people were very fond of nice things. Every race had learned how to take care of what the land dwellers were stupid enough to throw away into the ocean. Most mer races had learnt how to twist, braid and tie kelp and seaweed into ropes and how to make jewelries from pretty rocks or the wildlife. 

Fenris himself had a necklace with a large shark tooth in between two piranha teeth on a string made of leather he had salvaged from a sunken ship. Leto had a kelp string with a few pretty colorful shells attached by the base of his tail fin that would make a soft clinking sound if he flipped the tail just so. Varania was more the sort who found pretty gold chains from sunken ships and simply used what the land dwellers had thrown away, it was the usual behavior for tropical sea mers. 

He stashed the keys, the plastic brick with Anders' face on and the bag with white squares into the pouches on his new belt then grabbed the things from the junk pile and put them in the broken bag before scurrying away to one of his less used stashes and stored the items there.

That stash only had a few rocks and a fish's head so no one would really look for new objects there. Leto didn't like the fish scull and had screeched the first time he had gone through it and Fenris had scolded him for sneaking in his stuff. He didn't mind it much though, because Leto always was in his stuff, just like Fenris always were around Leto's stuff. It was a twin thing.

Besides, Fenris didn't plan on keeping these things. When Anders came back to the pond, Fenris would give the things he didn't want back to Anders. Not the things he liked though, those he was keeping for himself no matter how much Anders might complain. Unless the blond land dweller would threaten not to see him again, then he'd give back the shiny keys.

He hummed on some random tune to himself as he swam away to find something else to do for the day. He knew a dark cave not far away that needed exploring and perhaps he could drag Leto with him. Maybe they even could find something good to eat like crab or shellfish, both him and Leto loved everything that had a shell. Well, not turtles, but everything else.

But before Fenris even had time to finish that thought something large smacked straight into him, pressing him with a speed to the ocean floor. Dark arms wrapped around his middle and the force tackled him to the sandy bottom, pinning him face down in the sand. By reflex the lyrium lit up in fury and he was about to shift around and press his hand into his attacker's chest to rip the heart out.

However, the markings flickered out as quick as they had lit when he realized who the other mer was. 

The bright orange fins and the dark skin alerted him that it was his twin even before he felt the familiar scent of his brother. When he did, he just sighed and flattened out on the bottom. At least it was sand and not sharp gravel and the worst Leto would do would be to lick his cheek or something. Leto really wasn't much for violence.

"Get off me Leto." He sighed bored.

Years with his twin had taught him that if he wanted to get Leto stop teasing or anything like that, he'd just pretend to be utterly bored. That would make his brother so frustrated he'd give up and rush off to find Varania instead. But this time Leto seemed to be strangely excited, nearly vibrating on top of Fenris' back where his twin laid pressed to him.

"You're being familiar! Who are you being familiar with? Who's your match!" Leto squeaked far too close to Fenris' pointy ear to be comfortable.

"I am  doing no such thing! Leto,  **off!** " Fenris growled, trying to wiggle free.

Leto didn't even budge from where his stupid twin was pressing him down. Not that Fenris was struggling hard since he didn't want to hurt Leto but he did feel very uncomfortable and slightly panicked over the questions. He didn't want his brother to know about the unfortunate match with a land dweller. He didn't want Leto to know about Anders and see Fenris as... well, what any mer would see him if they found out.

"I didn't think much of the fabric at your arm, but this is definitely being familiar. You found your match Fen! Tell me about them."

Fenris sighed and dropped his head against the sand in defeat. There was no point in denying it because if he did, Leto would probably just pull the fabric of his arm and Fenris didn't want to loose Anders' shirt. How much he didn't want to admit it, he had grown fond of having objects belonging to Anders on his persona and didn't want to loose either belt or the shirt on his arm.

He had thought very loosely that it was common among mers to take each others belonging to keep close. It was part of the process, to ease the transition of owning things on your own and sharing everything with the second part of your soul. Come to think of it, the only reason he hadn't felt that constant urge and need to find Anders, was most likely due to having some of Anders' stuff.

Now that he thought of it he actually felt a little bad, Anders didn't have anything belonging to Fenris... that couldn't be very comfortable for the land dweller now could it? He would have to give something to Anders or the blond might get upset with him. Maybe the necklace... he was very fond of it and had fought a couple of piranhas to get the parts for making it.

But yes, that would be an appropriate gift. He wouldn't be too happy over parting with it but... he had nabbed a lot of things that Anders most likely  didn't want to be parted with either, so it was only fair. 

"Oh please, tell me Fenris? Who is your match? Oh is it that deep sea mer you've hunted with a couple of times?" His brother asked, drawing Fenris out of his planning. 

Letto shifted his hold on top of him and sprawled out more comfortably over Fenris' back and dropped his head on Fenris' shoulder, locking his green eyes with Fenris' own matching greens. 

Fenris had three options in this mess. One was bluntly ignoring his brother and live with constant questions and wining about wanting to know who it was, then he'd most likely be followed everywhere he swam. Fenris knew that his brother was brilliant at spying and if Leto didn't want to be seen he wouldn't be and one day he'd find out about Anders anyway. 

The second option was to lie, to tell Leto that it was indeed the deep sea mer with the long pretty hair. Leto wouldn't be the wiser for months since he never dared into the depths that Fenris dared into. The lyrium markings was the only thing enabling him to see down in the dark since both him and Leto had night vision but not vision to see into the pitch black.

The third option was to tell the truth. He could let Leto know about that fatal day in the pond, about touching Anders in order to save Leto from the other land dwellers. He could tell about how he had returned again and again in hope of finding his stupid, but very cute match. He could tell how hopeless he felt over his match being a land dweller and that there was no chance to a future with Anders. 

Because what future was there to be had with a man that couldn't breath under water without help?

These thoughts were thoughts he hadn't thought of up until now. Thoughts he hadn't even considered since he'd refused to accept Anders being his match and his only reason to going to the pond again that first time had been to ask the spirits to break the bond. He hadn't considered how changed things were now, how he didn't want to break the bond any longer. 

But now he did think of it, and he felt sick.

"He is a land dweller." He said quietly and felt his heart clench as if he himself had reached in to squeeze it. "It cannot be but the spirits will not listen." 

He curled his tail slightly and shrunk into himself, trying to get away from these prodding questions his brother asked, trying to get away from the truth of his own thoughts. He just wanted to continue to see Anders the way he had today, forever, he wanted to see the blond smile, to see the stupid blond sit on the rock and read or wait for him.

Leto had gone very still on top of him, then his twin slid down and shuffled around until they both laid sideways, chest to chest and Leto pulled him close and they hugged. Just silently hugged as Fenis felt his eyes prickle with tears that just washed away by the water around them. Up until now he had been able to be blissfully oblivious of the pain this would cause him, but Leto had pulled him back to the reality of things. 

He was scared and hurt. He never thought he would find a match and now it was in a man that would never work out. He doubted Anders even knew what had happened between them. Did the humans even get these bonds? Anders hadn't even known about the mark the first day even if Fenris had known it instantly. 

"Oh Fen, I am sure the spirits have a plan." His brother mumbled to his hair. "They always have plans." 

Fenris closed his eyes and buried his head to his brother's neck while breathing in deeply. He wanted to believe that, but what plans could the spirits have when they did this? Other than to punish them both for something they must have done in their previous lives or something of the sort. 

"He can't breath under water without help Leto." Fenris said muffled against his brother's skin. "What future could we possibly have?"

"Maybe the spirits or the evanuris can bless him with a tail. Does your mark match his skin or is it a color?" Leto asked while rubbing his tail against Fenris' own.

Fenris opened his eyes and moved his head from the crook of his brother's neck. The colors of the markings were a match to the other mer's tail, everyone knew that. The land dwellers had no tails so the mark should match their skin should it not? Yet his mark was icy blue.

"It... is the color of an Anderfells mer, like thick ice." He admitted. 

"See! The spirits has a plan Fen. Surely that mark would not have had color if not your match will one day have a tail." Leto assured him. "Can I meet with him?" 

Fenris huffed. "If I say no will you follow nonetheless?"

Leto's cheeky grin said it all and Fnris sighed before burying his head back against his brother's skin. He supposed it couldn't hurt too much to bring Leto. He'd prefer not to be spied on by his brother or he'd never be able to relax around Anders again.

He only hoped Anders wouldn't mind Leto too much.


	6. Almost a kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders and Fenris almost kisses but unfortunately are interrupted.

It took Anders a ridiculous story about loosing his bag to a fish and making the story believable before Hawke had stopped asking him if he had been mugged and threatened to go to Aveline. When Hawke finally believed his ridiculous lie, the bearded man had of course laughed until he cried over Anders getting mugged by a bloody fish and teased him mercilessly all the way back to Anders' apartment.

But Anders couldn't really complain, especially since Hawke gave him a nice hand me down phone and swung by the grocery store with Anders to pay for food Anders would need as long as his money, card and ID were all gone. Also for the fact that Hawke managed to break into Anders' flat without breaking either the lock on the door or any windows. 

Anders could just laugh himself bloody lucky he had found his car keys in the back pocket of his jeans so that he at least could drive his car without the expenses of getting a new key to it. 

Oh well, at least the meeting with Fenris had done some good. He had been able to settle aside some of that need to be by the pond and go back to work without risking bandaging up the wrong arm or healing on the wrong place. At least until Friday afternoon when he again couldn't stop think about anything other than the blasted merman who kept stealing his stuff. 

Luckily being Friday mean that the next day was Saturday and that meant that he'd have a free day to be allowed to do whatever he wanted and what he wanted was to see Fenris again. 

What he didn't expect upon arriving by the pond was Fenris dart around in the pond in a speed that made him look like nothing more than a white streak rippling the water. Anders didn't even try to follow Fenris with his eyes and instead just sat down on his usual rock and slipped his feet into the water to wait until Fenris was done with whatever it was that the merman was doing. 

Today he made sure that his boots, the jacket and everything not physically attached to his body laid so far out of reach that Fenris would have to actually get up and walk at least six steps to get to them. Just to be on the safe side because he couldn't explain a second time for Hawke how he got mugged by a fish if he lost his spare keys or the hand me down phone. 

The second surprise of the day came when the handsome merman hauled himself up on the same rock Anders sat on and straight into his personal space. One strong arm on each of Anders' sides and the tail a firm weight between his legs, wetting down his jeans. Fenris' face so close to Anders' that if Anders leaned forwards just the slightest they'd be kissing. 

And just like that, Anders had no idea what to do with his hands. 

Should he put them on Fenris' scaly hips? Should he put them on Fenris' chest? Keep them in his lap? Let them hand beside him? Put them in Fenris' white long hair and pull the merman in for a deep passionate kiss that would get both their worlds spinning? That last one was very tempting but also made him blush. He settled for very carefully putting his hands over the new belt on Fenris' hips he hadn't seen before but that was somewhat familiar. 

"Hi there." Anders said slowly. He knew the blush was already firmly in his face but the fact that Fenris' cheeks were tainted red as well gave him courage. "You come here often?" 

Stupid, stupid courage. Oh please maker  just take him now before the absolutely terrible flirt reached Fenris. But it had been the absolute best thing he could have done with the merman this close to him. It had either been that flirt or tugging Fenris into a kiss and Anders really had no idea what he was allowed to try with the merman. 

He only knew he didn't want to scare Fenris away from ever seeing him again by clumsily do something something Fenris wouldn't want. Thus he just kept his fingers on the belt and the pouches, trying to keep his breath from hitching and bit his lower lip to stop himself from doing some more absolutely terrible flirting.

The wide emerald orbs that was locked with his own amber ones were so deep and beautiful Anders feared he'd get lost by just looking into hem. He almost missed as Fenris' tongue darted out, wetting the merman's lips and the slight tilting forwards bringing them just a fraction closer. So close he felt Fenris' breath against his own. 

Anders heart began racing in his chest. Faster than Fenris had been swimming just before this and the blood in his veins were on fire. A good fire mind you, the energizing kind of fire that made his cheek heat even worse and the pit of his stomach coil. The kind of fire that woke the hundreds of butterflies living in Anders' stomach. A fire that made him lean just slightly towards Fenris, the fire that would make them kiss. 

Oh maker. 

Before their lips actually even met however, there was the sound of someone clearing their throat and Anders and Fenris pulled away from each other as if they had burnt themselves. Fenris' blush blossomed up furiously in the merman's face as he scrambled back into the water and Anders quickly shifted backwards and crossed his arms defensively over his chest.

He was painfully aware that he most likely were redder than a bloody tomato but he desperately tried to look casual about it. As if nothing at all had happened right there and he hadn't been caught almost kissing the most handsome man in Thedas. 

That's when he realized exactly who had interrupted their almost kiss. 

Fenris wasn't alone in the water today, and Andraste's flaming nipples but the other merman looked almost just like Fenris. Only his hair wasn't white, it was dark brown and there weren't any tattoos in his face or down on his chest. But other than that, they practically could have been the same bloody person.

"There are two of you?" Anders asked, staring between the two of them. They clearly must be twins. 

"I'm Leto, Fenris is my twin. You must be Anders! Is it true land dwellers eats their own babies?"

Anders stared in disbelief at the brunet. This merman, Leto had effectively said more to him in the closest ten seconds than Fenris had for over a week. The voices were almost the same but Leto's wasn't as deep as Fenris' voice was. It was a bit like hearing Fenris speak without pressing his voice down and Anders wondered if that was indeed what Fenris did and for what purpose. 

"I.. err, yes, I'm Anders and what? Why would we do that?" 

"We've heard stories, all mer have." Leto responded and suddenly Anders personal space was again invaded but this time by the brunet who was a lot less comfortable to have so close than Fenris. "Do you feel with these things? Like I feel with my tail?" Leto asked while prodding his legs. "How do you move with them? How do they work under water?" 

Anders was suddenly immensely happy that Fenris had been his first encounter with the merman species because he was definitely not at all comfortable with Leto so close. He could just imagine how badly he'd take it if Fenris had made him feel this uncomfortable the first time they had met when he had been freaked out over the fact that Fenris existed at all and frankly scared Fenris would actually eat him. 

He had thought, back then, that Fenris clearly was rather bad at the whole personal space deal, touching him the first time they met. But now he realized that Fenris had been going very slowly forwards with him, that this very likely could be how merpeople usually would do.

He sent the white haired merman a pleading look for help only to find the white haired beauty with an amused grin on his face. The questions kept being bombarded at him by Leto. Quick fingers were getting a bit too close to Anders waistline to be comfortable even if the merman was just trailing his fingers after his happy trail exclaiming excitedly about hair.

"Leto, enough. Stop touching my... Anders... stop touching Anders." 

Anders could have screamed. Never in his life had he been bloody grateful that anyone had interfered when a handsome man was touching him, but right now he was really grateful. He also hadn't heard a word out of Fenris since the merman told him his name, and now suddenly Fenris was calling him his? Like his what? Boyfriend?

They hadn't even actually kissed, but maker did Anders get excited by the thought of them being sort of together. 

"Oh fine..." Leto said reluctantly, eyeing Anders' legs with longing interest as he sank back into the water. "He's got so much hair."

"I err.." Maker, what was his mouth up to now? "Know someone who don't mind being... uh, touched. I could bring him. He has a beard." 

He saw the brunet light up like a satalina tree before he was a flurry of touches and pleas against Fenris and Anders let out a quiet sigh of relief that he wasn't the one being touched anymore. Also a slight pang of jealousy over not being able to touch Fenris that much. Even if Fenris and Leto were brothers and the touches weren't even a little sexual and Leto seemed to touch everyone a little bit too much. 

"Please Fen, you won't let me touch your land dweller and I respect that but... Fen...."

"Fine. But we will not tell Varania."

Fenris said with a dramatic sigh and wrapped both arms around his brother. Leto squeaked and mushed his face against Fenris' in a way Anders usually wouldn't see anyone but maybe little kids do, before the world taught them it was improper. Clearly mermen had a whole different view on touching than humans, dwarves or elves did.

But that thought was pushed aside as he realized he was standing for the task to explain to Hawke about mermaids actually existing and how he had promised that one was allowed to touch Hawke. Makers breath, couldn't he have just said Isabela, that would have been a lot easier for Anders to make come true. But he had promised a beard, and if Leto was occupied with Hawke...

Maybe him and Fenris could have that kiss.


	7. Hawke's side.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HAWKE'S POV!

Hawke didn't even know why he had let Anders talk him into this to be perfectly honest. Maybe it was because Anders was one of his best friends, or maybe because Hawke really, really needed to get the hell out of the estate where Carver, Bethany, Isabela and Merrill all for the moment thought it a grand idea to have a whole weekend worth of sleepover. Or maybe because Anders was the only one he didn't feel annoyed with this week. 

In fact, Hawke had been annoyed with pretty much everyone and everything for months now. From Carver's whining about his new college, to the way Isabela rubbed up against him because she wanted something he wasn't in the mood to give her. And he could count on one hand the times in his life his dick hadn't been interested with getting inside something hot and tight. 

But after his mother's death everything had just got a layer of grey over it. He hadn't been able to have fun with the things he usually found fun. He slept most of the days away and when he got up, he felt like if his battery was drained by the time he came out of the shower and he was ready to drag himself back to the bed to more sleep. 

Anders had told him it was signs of depression, but Hawke hadn't cried. He hadn't been actually sad, everything was just wrong in the world. Well, it had been okay when he had slept over that night on Anders' couch and they had watched a movie together on Anders' junk of a TV and Anders had just been there. There hadn't been questions, no pity in Anders' eyes and no strange tension. 

He still loved Isabela and Merrill, but the love felt... different, wrong. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to think about it. More times than he wanted to admit he had thought about breaking up with them but... he needed to talk. He didn't know who he could talk with. He wanted to tell someone that  maybe he didn't want what he had now. In ten years from now, he wanted to wake up beside someone that he felt... like if they wouldn't just run off some day.

And maybe that's why he had accepted to come with Anders even if it was on the crazy quest to find mermaids.

Maker, did he ever meet anyone normal? Ah well, at least Trouble got a nice walk and the pond was one of the few things that wasn't grey in the world he supposed. Some fresh air and sun would probably do him good too.

"So, you honestly believe there are mermaids now? And that you have met two of them and that's why we had to break into your apartment last Wednesday?" Hawke asked and sighed. "And that one of these mermaids want to touch my beard?"

Thinking about it, maybe Anders' head had gotten knocked a bit worse than Hawke'd thought the day he tripped in the water. Maybe they should have gone to Justice instead of out drinking. Oh, but Hawke had needed a stiff one and the night had been okay, almost making him feel like normal and it was too late to change that now.

"Just, give them some time Hawke. Fenris always shows up. Mini tart?" 

"Oh! Yes." 

Hawke was a sucker for Anders' baking. The spirit healer had sucked at when they first met. Hawke remembered tasting a cookie Anders had made and got the distinct feeling that Anders must have accidentally added Ser Pounce-A-Lot's food in the dough. But now, about four years later Anders' baking was to die for.

Anders had told him that there wasn't any baking happening in the circle tower of Ferelden. Everyone seemed to kiss everyone and more but they didn't actually serve apple pie. Hawke had tried to imagine what his life would have looked like if there hadn't been his mother's apple pies in it as a child. Things sure would have been a lot more dull. Some of his best memories involved pie. 

When he bit into the mini tart and the lemon curd exploded in his mouth it totally made up for the crazies Anders was having. Especially when Anders handed him two of them at once. That would probably make up for murder in Hawke's eyes.

And no, he still didn't approve how Varric made him sound like he was fat just because he appreciated food. He didn't love food in the way Varric made it sound like, no one loved food so much. Hawke just liked to eat... because eating was important. If you didn't eat you wouldn't grow up to be a big boy. 

"Anders, do you think I should break up with Merrill and Isabela?" Hawke asked after a wile of silence and his fingers licked clean.  

"What? I thought you were happy with them?" 

"I was... I just.. I don't know. Ever since mother died I just feel like it isn't..." 

"Oh. Hawke... Look, maybe I am not the one to ask about relationship advice, but... if it doesn't make you happy, it's probably not right for you and to be honest, life is too short not to go for what makes you happy."

Hawke sighed and laid down on the warm rocks they were sitting on and took a deep breath before dipping his entire head under water. He used to do that when he was a kid, him and the neighbor kid Thomas would do it whenever their parents had said it was to cold to bathe. For a moment it was nice to pretend he was that kid again, no trouble in the world and no responsibilities.

But just like the need for air, reality soon pushed forwards again and he pulled his head out of the water but stayed laying on his back staring up in the blue sky. 

Anders cared about him. Once upon a time they could have been something, Anders had shown interest but Hawke had turned him down in favor of the exotic Rivaini girl they had met in a bar brawl. Now, well, now it was much too late to win Anders back.

After a while he tugged his shirt off and used it as a makeshift pillow and they just stayed there in companionable silence. It was a long while until the silence was broken by a small splash. Hawke assumed Anders had wiggled his feet in the water or something and didn't bother looking up. Not until the sun was blocked from his face and there was water dripping in his face and Anders quietly saying his name. 

What he saw when he opened his eyes was the most gorgeous fucking elf in entire Thedas staring down at him upside down. There was a curious look in his pretty face and the water droplets came from the short brown hair that hung down in his face. Hawke felt a real need to reach up and gently pull his fingers through the wet hair. 

"Makers breath you are gorgeous." A bit too late did he realize he was speaking out loud. "I mean! Err, what?" 

Anders snorted from the side and the wet olive skin of the gorgeous elf tinted red from an adorable blush. But there was also a very cute giggle accompanying the blush and soon there was a dark hand stretching out and gentle wet fingers touched the skin over his heart. In an instant there was a soft tingling spreading under his skin all through his chest. 

A pulse of electricity pumping from the spot where their skin connected out through Hawke's entire body and it had him gasping in surprise. The words 'make my world spark' got an entire new meaning. The months that had felt grey for him since his mother's death came crashing down in a cascade of bright colors sounds and tastes. 

The elf's eyes widened in surprise and for a second or two Hawke feared the elf would pull his hand back and rob him of the fantastic feeling of everything feeling just right. But instead he suddenly found upside down lips to his own and... Maker! Were they kissing? Was he actually kissing someone he shouldn't? Did this count as cheating when it felt soooooo good? Was this...

All thoughts just died away as the kiss seemed to make them evaporate. Nothing existed but Hawke himself and this drop dead gorgeous elf and he couldn't help letting one hand up to stroke through the brown short hair. Even if it was wet, it somehow wasn't tangled. If there was some kind of anti tangle spell on hair, he really needed someone to learn it and use it on him. 

He let the feeling of something finally  right guide him in the kiss. The first real thing that felt right since his mother had died and Hawke intended to prolong the relieving feeling for as long as he possibly could. Forever if that had been an option. 

He slid his tongue over the other's lips and was granted access without hesitation.

His partner tasted like salty water and the way seaweed kind of smelled like. That flavor quickly mixed with the flavor of the lemon curd from the tart Hawke had been eating just before, creating some intoxicating odd shared flavor he knew he would quick and easy become addicted to if he didn't stop this soon. He knew this was so out of the area of okay, but he couldn't even come to care.

Not when it felt so right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO I am maybe thinking of making a sister work to this where we follow the thing going on with Hawke and Leto in a separate work if anyone is interested?


	8. I saw this flower and I thought of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawke and Leto kissed and Anders isn't sure how he's supposed to respond to this shit.

Anders was staring, what in the void else was he supposed to do with a display like that? 

Hawke and Leto were making out. If making out was the right choice of word for it, they were sucking face like if each others lips were the only resource of air in this world. Anders wasn't quite sure if he would classify  this under _gross_  or _awkward._  Perhaps a bit of both. 

Hawke, his best and closest friend. Who'm was already in a relationship with two of their other friends,  _albeit a not so happy relationship as Anders had thought, but a relationship nonetheless_. And Leto, the younger twin brother of the man Anders had fallen flat like a pancake for and that he wanted to perhaps one day get together with if luck was with him and the feelings were returned. 

"So... is that the err, the real mermaid greeting because I remember it quite differently." He tried to joke but it fell very flat.

He tore his eyes from Hawke and Leto in favor of glancing at Fenris. Anders wondered what it'd be like if he was allowed to kiss Fenris the way Leto kissed Hawke. Not a care in the world who saw them together and just devour each others faces. He wondered if Fenris would taste like fish and salt water, he wondered just how sharp Fenris' teeth were and how it'd feel to run his tongue along the row of sharp teeth. 

But then he realized that Fenris was not looking amused at all. Teeth gritted, jaw clenched and shoulders tense.

"No. It is not." The tension practically bleed out through the sharp words. 

Oh... right, that was Leto, Fenris'  _younger_ twin brother making out with Hawke. Oh maker no... Anders felt his heart sink to some deep dark pit in his chest and he suddenly felt all hope rush away from him of ever being allowed close to Fenris again if he didn't salvage this somehow. By the bloody void! Why had he brought Hawke? He knew Hawke was charming and frankly very handsome. 

The thought that he'd never get to see Fenris again because he accidentally set up Fenris' twin with Hawke suddenly seemed like a very realistic thought. He was surprised to find just how hollow the world felt by the thought of not having Fenris within it. His heart clenched in protest and his brain worked sluggishly as if it had broken down. 

"Carver burned your kiss me I'm Fereldan shirt." He blurted out without thinking.

"Son of a! He did what?!"

Oh well, Carver hated him anyway so not much of a loss there. At least it accomplished what Anders had sort of hoped for, Leto squeaked in surprise and slipped back into the water and Hawke sat up quickly, staring at Anders. Anders noted how Hawke rubbed his fingers over his heart, exactly where Leto had had his hand and Anders' eyes widened. Oh no. 

He remembered the tingling in his own leg after Fenris had touched it. It had been wobbly and felt odd and the next morning he had woken up with a tattoo to match Fenris. If Hawke had just bonded with Leto... Maker's fucking ass, the bloody spirits of this lake needed a long vacation and stop messing with people's lives! 

He looked at Fenris and saw the white haired merman holding his brother's hand with a frown, while Leto had a huge grin on his face. Oh yes, he really had to bloody bring Hawke? He couldn't have just grabbed Varric? Varric was too in love with his bloody tablet; Bianca to even get interested by anyone else in this way. And he had chest hair enough to make up for a damn beard. But no, Anders had to bring Hawke.

He groaned quietly and pressed both his hands to his eyes and closed them tightly. Maybe if he wished it enough he'd wake up and find himself still in his bed with Ser Pounce batting at his feet under the blanket to make him go up and feed him.  

"Hey! My shi-eit!" Hawke began accusing but ended up in a surprised shout. 

Anders snapped his head back up from his hands when there was a loud splashing. Hawke popped up moments afterwards coughing and spluttering while rubbing water out of his eyes. Leto must have dragged Hawke into the water, because the brunet merman was closeup in Hawke's personal space, touching whatever he could reach and mouthing silent little exclaims and squeaks. 

"Holy fuck... you have a tail." Anders heard Hawke mumble.

But the bearded man didn't freak out. He didn't make himself look like a fool by blabbering about food or anything of the sort. He just stood there and let Leto touch wherever the merman wanted. In return Hawke was allowed to stroke his fingers over that long lanky tail. Something Anders had wanted to do on Fenris since probably the first day he saw him. 

A small pang of jealousy ran through him, then the feeling of abandonment. He supposed the second one wasn't so strange since Fenris was nowhere to be seen, most likely having darted off when Hawke had been pulled into the water. Which of course meant that now, well Anders was the bloody third wheel while Hawke got to touch and make out with a very hot merman. 

This Sunday was very quickly turning into a terrible day and Anders got up on his feet. He didn't want to spend rest of the day watching Hawke and Leto being all hands and lips on each other. A petty voice in his head told him to remind Hawke about Isabela and Merrill, but he knew that would be a dirty low move. So instead he just left to take a walk around the frankly rather large pond. 

Sure, he had hoped for today to involve kisses. But those kisses were supposed to happen between him and Fenris while Leto sated his curiosity on humans with Hawke. They weren't supposed to happen between Hawke and Leto. 

Anders didn't even realize the angry tears that rolled fat over his cheek were there until he had walked pretty much to the other side of the bloody pond. It wasn't large enough for him not to see Hawke and Leto, but it was far enough for him to be spared of the details or the sounds. 

He sighed deeply and sank down a patch of grass beside the water with his knees to his chest and rested his forehead to his arm. He was being unfair and ridiculous. Hawke was by nature very quick to adapt to strange situations and he deserved to have someone that made him happy and if that was Leto... well, Anders should be happy for them.

He just wished he wouldn't have to sacrifice his own happiness for Hawkes. 

But this was what he deserved wasn't it? The maker really hated mages, and that's why bad things always happened to them wasn't it? Hawke was charming and brave, Anders was skittish and claustrophobic. Even if Fenris ever could like him, he probably shouldn't, Anders wasn't boyfriend material, he was more quick and easy fuck material. 

He sighed and shook his head. He hated when his thoughts delved down like this on dark paths. Hated what had happened him in his earlier life still had such an affect after so many years, after so many therapists and antidepressants. He hated that the circle had changed him, hated that first enchanter Irving had sent him down in a year of solitary confinement. He hated what had walked back out from there, because it wasn't Anders, and he'd probably never be himself again. 

He had to work with the shattered pieces left behind by the bloody circle and it's (to the world) amazingly good free magical school system. 

Anders was so deep in thoughts that he didn't even notice Fenris until a soft hand was touching his arm and Anders startled frightened. For a wild moment the fear of templars had made him believe it was someone else, but when he looked into those emerald orbs he relaxed in an instant. Fenris had a small shy smile on his lips and before Anders had time to open his mouth to speak, a bag was gently pushed into his lap. 

It was his bag actually. Or rather what was left of his bag, the straps were cut off, there was two holes in the front where there had been two pockets and... it was filled to the brim with white dawn lotuses.

Anders could do nothing more than stare for a long while.

In a year, if a person was lucky, one might find up to four maybe five of these white healing flowers. They were incredible rare, only grew at hidden locations and never twice at the same place unless a person knew how exactly to pick them without damaging the sensitive nerves. Which no one seemed to be able to do. It was a remarkable healing herb and one of these flowers could help cure up to six or seven patients practically from death.

"Are... these for me?" He asked very carefully. "Where did you even find these...?" 

"You... picked one. The first day..." Fenris said a bit sheepishly. "I remember you seeming very happy over finding it."

"Fenris... this is worth at least... twenty sovereigns... we could heal so many patients with these." Anders whispered. "Thank you." 

"They make you happy." Fenris mumbled with that blush covering his cheeks. 

"They do." Anders said quietly and smiled. "Because they are from you." 

Anders could have laughed over how relieved he felt when he saw Fenris' pointed ears perk up visibly. Fenris didn't touch him much, but clearly Fenris still wanted him to be happy. That was more than enough to make chase away a lot of dark thoughts that had been fogging up Anders' brain. There was still a chance him and Fenris could work this into something more. To work this into kisses.

He'd just have to be patient. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I will just add Hawke/Leto romance in here and for any of you who don't want to want to read those nerds side to this, know this:  
> I will make a little note in the beginning of those chapters alerting you if it's Hawke or Leto's POV :) 
> 
> Hope you'll all still enjoy, this is still a main Fenders story! <3


	9. A phone call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little filler, Leto and Anders have a chat, Anders figures out why Fenris isn't all over him and Leto get's to know a few things about humans.

To begin with, Leto had been looking for his land dweller, his Hawke. But as it turned out only Fenris' land dweller, Anders was by the pond today. 

Fenris wasn't with Leto this day, his twin was hunting in the chasm for deep sea fishes. They were creepy as the void but tasted a lot better than whatever fish they could catch up here. The deep chasms, fishes reminded Leto of the fishes he'd sometimes eat in Tevinter, they tasted similar but less muddy. Which was nice, mud wasn't very tasty after all. 

He sometimes wished he'd be able to join Fenris while on hunting, but the deep waters made his head hurt and he'd always feel like if he'd freeze his fins off. There was also the lack of vision and the creepy large fishes that he couldn't handle because he lacked the strength his twin possessed. Sure Fenris wouldn't be able to take down a big shark, but he'd be able to fend it off and escape. That was more than most river mers could say. 

Lyrium, Leto had understood was very painful, but it was also warm by nature which made Fenris perfect to huddle up against when it was cold. But it also enabled his twin to be able to stand sudden changes. Such as the changes one had to go through when swimming down a hundred meters below surface as well as it made Fenris' body stronger, faster and more resistant.

But Fenris and Fenris' lyrium markings weren't what was on Leto's minds today. 

What was on his minds was the little black device laying beside Anders. Not the device itself, but the noises that came from it. Music that made him want to dance, so many odd new noises that mixed together and made something beautiful. He wondered if humans could dance but... how would they do that on their clumsy legs? It didn't make sense to Leto. 

"Anders, do humans dance?" He finally asked after a while of trying to twist his head around it. 

Anders glanced up from the pages and folders he was reading and writing in, arched a brow and Leto tilted his head in question. 

"Hm? Dance? Oh, yes. I do a neat spicy shimmy." Anders said and laughed lightly. 

Leto wasn't exactly certain he knew what Anders meant with that but he wasn't sure asking would be the good thing to do either. He didn't want the land dweller to show him and fall over on his legs and hurt himself, that'd be bad. If Anders got hurt, Fenris wouldn't be happy at him for being the one causing it. Also, he kind of liked Anders, he was nice and he made Fenris happy. 

"How does land dwellers live?" He asked instead and arched a brow. 

"You always call me land dweller, I'm a human you know." Anders replied with a chuckle. "But I live in a flat about seven floors up with my cat. One bedroom, a kitchen, a bathroom and a living room. How do you live?" 

A flat? Did Anders live on something flat? Or in something flat? How would he fit? Or maybe it was just a flat rock up in the air that he lived in? And human? That's their word for what they were? He could probably remember that. The rest of it didn't much make sense either, he knew what a bed was, him Fenris and Verania had slept in their fair share of beds in sunken ships. Not very comfortable but they worked. 

"Me and Fenris live with our sister in a cave. It has a rock that makes it almost invisible so we don't have to worry for predators. The big sharks don't get in and the smaller ones don't like the hum of lyrium." He said and shrugged. 

"Lyrium? There is lyrium where you live?"

Anders sounded confused. Leto was also confused, hadn't Anders realized the marks were lyrium the moment he saw Fenris? Maybe lyrium marks weren't usual among the land dwellers... thinking about it he realized they probably weren't. There was no reason for the land dwellers to have the marks since they didn't live in places completely dark. 

"Fenris' marks, they are made of lyrium. He got them when we were just merelings."

"All those... How in the void is he even still alive?!" Anders exclaimed. "They are all over his body!"

"He nearly died." Leto admitted as he looked at Anders. The blond was upset, worried. Those were good feelings, it meant he cared about Fenris. "Deep sea mer all have lyrium branded into their bodies, just small patches, like a hand, a portion of the tail, some even have it in their faces. But, no one but Fenris have them all over his body."

"But... how do you get them? Are they a natural occurrence? Why don't you have them?"

Anders had put his papers aside and was now giving Leto all his full attention. Leto pulled himself up on the rock and looked at Anders thoughtfully, he wasn't entirely certain this was his to tell, but he at the same time he wanted Anders to understand why Fenris wasn't like other mer, why he didn't touch. 

"When we are just guppies we are full of magic and natural resistance to a lot of things. The deep sea mer takes their guppies to a lyrium vein deep in the sea and let the guppies touch it. When they do, the magic somehow absorbs it but too much can be deadly so the parent pull their child away when there is lyrium enough covering the chosen area. Fen accidentally touched one, we didn't see it, he was exploring and I wasn't with him. I had gotten a hook in my fin a week before." 

"How did you find him again?" 

"A friend of mother came back with his unconscious body. I remember being very scared." Leto admitted.

"Do... do they hurt him a lot?" Anders asked with a hard swallow.

"He says they doesn't anymore but I know they hurt him. It's easier in the water, it's cooling. That's why he won't touch you very much. Your skin is so dry, dry skin against his mark is like rubbing gravel into open wounds he said once." 

"Oh... but..." Leto grinned as he saw the gears turn in Anders' head. "It's better under the water?" Anders asked hesitant. 

"He would like that." Leto said and nodded.

"He'd like what?" Anders asked with a slight blush.

"If you swam with him. He won't ask you, he... is bad at asking for things. But he'd like that." 

"Thank you Leto... could you tell him I was here?" 

"Yes, tell Hawke I miss him?" He asked gently. 

"Actually, I can do better than that." Anders said with a laugh. 

Leto curiously looked at Anders as he picked up his music device and turned off the tunes before doing something else and Leto wiggled closer in curiosity trying to get a look at the device while Anders was doing... whatever he was doing. He nearly jumped off the rock though when Anders held it over to him. 

"Hold it to your ear and wait." Anders instructed. 

Leto awkwardly  took the device in both hands and then pressed it to his ear. He wasn't sure why he even did this but he figured he could humor Anders and do what he wanted. Anders straightened the device slightly against his ear and cheek and suddenly Leto heard beeping. Like the music beeping but just the one kind of beeping instead of several sounds going together. 

Then as suddenly as it had began it stopped. But instead of the beeps, there was a very familiar voice was speaking through the device. "Hey Anders, what's up?" Hawke's voice,  **his** Hawke.

Leto made a loud happy squeaking noise over hearing his match so close to his ear and his tail flickered in the water excitedly. He had never met any magic that allowed one to hear another person without being at the same place, but apparently the land dwellers had figured it out. 

"Hawke!" He managed to squeak out happily.

"Leto?" Hawke asked surprised. 

"Hawke!" Leto squeaked again, a little louder this time. Suddenly having forgotten about... well how to word. 

There was a warm laugh from the device as Hawke laughed at his squeaking and Leto smiled stupidly, he loved Hawke's laugh and he always wanted to hear it.

"Hey there handsome, did Anders teach you have to work a phone?" Hawke asked and Leto was certain he might explode of excitement and giddiness. 

"I miss you." He breathed out. "Hawke I miss you! Please come soon?" He asked and curled his tail in anticipation.

"You stole my shirt the last time." Hawke laughed over the line. "And one of my shoes! I had to go home with one shoe you little minx!"

There wasn't actual annoyance or accusation from Hawke though so Leto wasn't actually worried about having stepped any lines. He flickered the tail once again to get a glimpse of the scraps of fabric and the one shoelace that was tied close to the tail fin. He liked the color red and it matched prettily against his orange fin so when he had seen Hawke's red shirt he had nabbed it. The shoe had just sort of accidentally slipped down with the shirt. 

"You let them lay around." He said innocently. "Will you come? Please." 

"Yeah, getting my new shoes on now. I'll see you in half an hour handsome."


	10. The comforts of water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders goes for a swim with Fenris, panics and get's a nice surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was aiming for sweet fluff but it ended accidentally in smut. Sorry about that!

Anders fiddled nervously with the button of his jeans, he wasn't sure he should do this or if it even was a good idea. Usually he wouldn't even go shirtless in public, didn't want people to see his scars, but dressing off just to his underwear? Madness. Wasn't there some kind of decency law making that illegal? The more he thought about it the more certain he was that there indeed was such a thing. 

Sure, it wasn't like the pond attracted many visitors and during the times he'd been there he hadn't seen anyone but himself, Fenris, Leto and Hawke. But what if today was the day people decided was the day to be at the pond and they'd catch Anders with his pants down, literary. What if people saw his scars... 

No. 

He couldn't think about that, not if he wanted to ever touch Fenris properly. He was going to do this and he was going to do this now. Nothing, especially not himself would keep him from getting into the water and hope for Fenris to show up today. And wouldn't that just be his luck if he stood in the water all day without Fenris even showing up. 

With a shake of his head Anders quickly slipped out of his jeans, folded them and put them by the little niche where he'd put his shirt, socks and shoes already. They were out of reach for Fen and hidden away just in case someone would happen to walk by. Then he could just hide to some side and wait the person out without having to reveal himself. 

When his clothes was stashed away he walked over to the water and sat on the usual rock and dipped his toes in the water. It was a rather okay temperature as far as water without a heater came, it wasn't warm but Anders didn't risk freezing any important parts off. 

He looked down at himself one last time, wished he'd taken anything but the cookie monster boxers, before slipped into the water.

The water was deep enough at this edge of the pond, it went all the way up over his pectoral muscles and he made a little squeak and shivered by the cold water enveloping him. Sure it wasn't cold enough to freeze anything but it was still cold bloody cold in comparison to on land where the sun was heating him up.

"Oh come on Anders, it just a little water, not like you haven't been swimming lake Calenhad once." He chided himself.

"The lake in Ferelden?" A deep voice said from behind him. 

Anders wouldn't admit the shrill womanish shriek that rung through the air came from his own lips, even if it very much did. The sudden appearance of his... well, Fenris, had startled him enough to take a panicked half step away, which in turn made him slip on a slippery rock and fall down with his head under water. 

Not that he was down under there for very long. Strong arms wrapped around his middle and a sleek chest pressed against his own, pulling him back up over the surface with an ease no one should possess in water. Well, he supposed no one but a merman who had lived his entire life in the water and to who'm water was seen as home.

Anders gasped for air and coughed out the water he had accidentally swallowed and Fenris kept his arms wrapped around his middle. When Anders finally stopped coughing his cheeks were burning red of embarrassment over not only falling and being pulled up like a damsel of distress but also for his coughing and gasping. 

But that feeling was very soon pushed away in favor of giddiness and excitement when he realized exactly how much of his body that was touching the merman's. Fenris' face was just there, his arms tightly wrapped around Anders keeping them close together, the tail against his own bare legs. It was like a dream coming true and it only took a matter of moments before Anders had completely melted against Fenris. 

"If this is a dream, I don't wanna wake up." He hummed happily. 

The little chuckle that rumbled from Fenris chest resonated through Anders' own as they were pressed so closely together. In a perfect world, this would be something that occurred every day, preferably every morning as they woke up in the same bed. The thought brought a smile to Anders' lips and he could do nothing but sigh dreamy over it.

"You slipping under water is  dream?" Fenris asked with amusement in his voice. 

"No, you scooping me off my feet and holding me like a damsel in distress of course!"  He replied cheery. "Just how can I repay my savior? Typically the hero is rewarded with a kiss."

Anders really hoped he'd managed to come off as suave and not desperate for Fenris' lips against his own, but he doubted it. Which was kind of annoying really, with anyone else, Anders was a king on being suave. But when it came to Fenris... it was like if his brain just turned off his charm and turned on stupid and desperate. 

Fenris however just chuckled lightly and stroke one hand slowly up and then down Anders' side with the webbed fingers of his left hand. The lyrium tingled playfully against Anders' skin. Strange how he hadn't thought about the fact that the lyrium actually tingled against his skin before. Fenris had touched his legs at several occasions. 

"And just when may I collect on my reward?" Fenris' said smoothly. 

Anders just gaped and stared into those green eyes. Was he serious? Did Fenris just ask if he could kiss him? Or had he missed something here? But before he had time to counter it he heard himself stumble out a; "Whenever you want." And maker, if he hadn't sounded desperate before, he sure did now. 

Fenris got a wicked little smirk on his face, one that Anders knew of experience meant trouble. In one quick fluid motion Fenris's arms slipped away from his middle and his hands planted firmly on the stubble of Anders' cheeks and pulled. Anders stumbled forwards and in an instant they were both under water before he even had the time to take a deep breath. 

But Anders couldn't bring himself to care, all he could care about was the kiss. Fenris had pulled their heads close together and clashed their lips together in raw passion and the world had practically exploded. Anders hadn't realized he had been colorblind, deaf and empty his entire life until everything just flared alive around him.

The world suddenly was a much more vibrant place, his spectra of light and color doubled and tripled, his heard beat so hard and fast in his chest he was surprised it didn't explode. Everything wrong just turned right and he knew where he belonged. 

When Fenris slowly dragged him downwards and away in the water he should have pulled back. Should have panicked about drowning because there was no air, but he didn't. He didn't panic because he felt safe, a blind trust in Fenris told him that his love wouldn't let him drown, never. 

But after a long while that seemed like forever but still not long enough, they pulled apart from the kiss and Anders nearly choked on a nose full of water, having forgotten where they were. When he looked around he realized he actually had no idea where they were or how deep they were. He had been aware that Fenris was moving them but no idea how far because this looked like open sea.

He felt panic firmly start to stir in his stomach when he realized he had no more air. What if Fenris had forgotten that he needed to breath. The panic made him accidentally hitch in more water through his nose, making him cough violently, trying to struggle the water out without letting anything in. 

Just as he felt the prickling of tears Fenris was there, back in his space. Anders grabbed for his shoulders and Fenris placed his webbed fingers over his nose and looked at him expectantly. Anders shook his head in confusion and tried to motion that he needed to get up, to get air. But the merman just rolled his eyes at him and looked at him impatiently, taking a deep inhale of water as if to demonstrate. 

Anders wasn't entirely sure what the merman was trying to make him do here. He couldn't breath under water, no matter how much someone held their fingers over his nose. But before he had time to do much more his lungs gave in and gasped loudly. 

Cold water rushed into his mouth and poured down his throat, quick but... not painful. Instead of choking on it, it just rushed strangely through his throat and what filled his lungs felt like air. It was as if somewhere along the line of his throat the water had been filtered into air. He tried another small breath and the same sensation hit him once again. 

He stared confused at Fenris in front of him and Fenris smiled back at him before lifting his free hand, the one not occupied still holding Anders' nose, and took Anders' hand in his webbed one. Anders let Fenris guide his hand up to the  side of Fenris' neck. Carefully stroke his fingers over the thin five thin slits that he hadn't even seen before. 

Gills, his minds quickly supplied. Fenris would of course have gills to be able to breath in the excessive air underneath the water.

Fenris moved Anders' hand again, this time to Anders' own neck and when Anders stroke his fingers over the usually flat surface he felt the same thin lines across the sides of his throat. He could feel the pass of water for each breath he took. Somehow, he too had gills and the ability to breath under water, like Fenris. 

Fenris very carefully let Anders' nose go and Anders made sure not to try breathing with it again. Clearly this whole process only worked with his mouth. 

Fenris just patiently waited while Anders' prodded and touched his new additional gills, trying to make any sense of them. It shouldn't be enough to fill a full grown man's lungs with air, but he supposed magic was very much involved since he wasn't dying and magic did a lot of impossible things possible.

He looked at the merman and crossed his arms, sending an accusing look. Fenris could have told him before making him panic and think he'd drown down here. But the innocent smile on Fenris lips and the way the merman held his hand out in invitation entirely melted Anders' heart and he took Fenris' hand without hesitation. 

A decision he nearly regretted the moment Fenris set into action. In just a couple of seconds Fenris had gone from not moving at all to moving at a neck breaking speed, darting them through the open water, slightly downwards. They passed fishes, a forest of kelp and a sea turtle before Fenris slowed down and pulled Anders straight into a pitch black cave. 

This was probably the time to tell Fenris that he was claustrophobic and scared of the dark, but he had no way to make words under the water. And only seconds later the whole cave glowed up blue by the markings in Fenris' skin. That was a well needed distraction and Anders found he couldn't tear his eyes from the sight for an embarrassing long amount of time while Fenris lead them slowly through the cave, hand in hand. 

Well, to say Fenris was leading him was a bit of an overstatement, during this entire time Fenris had more or less dragged him through the water and Anders had just kind of hung along after him.

With the blue glow making the place a lot less freaky Anders could even enjoy and marvel of the beauty of an untouched underwater cave. Untouched by man at least, Fenris seemed to have been here before. But Anders did recognize how privileged he was to be allowed to see all of this. 

After a while of swimming however Fenris stopped and pulled Anders close to his chest. Anders wasn't one to complain and he slipped his own arms around Fenris' in return and looked at Fenris curiously. Fenris just gave him a sly smile and a quick peck on the lips before they slowly began ascending upwards in the cave until after some meters their heads cut through the surface. 

Anders who had worried slightly about being not able to breath properly over the water found that his worry had been vastly unfounded because he breathed air as easy as he had ever done. 

The second thing he notices was the magnificence of a cave. The roof was glowing bright blue, covered in a widespread net of raw lyrium veins. There was a floor overgrown by mosses and illuminating mushrooms and here and there thick patches of dawn lotuses were growing like if they were dandelions. 

The whole thing was so beautiful it hurt and Anders just stared around himself with open mouth. He didn't have a clue places like these could actually exist for real. It looked like something from a book or a movie. It actually looked a bit like Pandora from the movie Avatar. 

"Fenris... this is beautiful." He whispered quietly.

Frankly, he was whispering because he was afraid he'd disturb the beauty of the place if he spoke too loud, the soft humming from the lyrium gave the place a eternal feel about it.

Fenris who'm had let him go so he'd be able to see the place properly, appeared behind him and wrapped his arms around Anders' middle. Anders just smiled when there was a small kiss placed on his shoulder.

"Do you like it?" Fenris asked carefully. 

"Makers breath Fen, of course I do. It is amazing, I never thought there even existed places like this." 

Anders shifted around in Fenris' arms until they were pressed chest to chest again and their faces mere centimeters apart. It was a bit difficult since he had no where to put his feet and relied on Fenris to keep them both afloat. But he managed and as a reward he leaned in to place a kiss gently against Fenris' lips. 

He had noticed how Fenris' ears had perked up when he said he liked the place and now the elf melted pliant against him. He wondered if maybe this was where Fenris lived and he'd been worried Anders wouldn't like it. But that thought was pushed aside as Fenris gently pushed him against the ledge of the mossy rock. Anders reveled in how it provided the feeling of being pressed against a counter or a table and he had to admit that was one of his weaknesses. 

As the kiss deepened when Fenris very carefully and trying applied tongue Anders couldn't help the reaction in his body as heat began traveling downwards. Fenris, he found, tasted nothing like fish at all. He tasted like salt water and by some strange reason mint. That was a surprise, but a surprise he didn't care to put much thought to since he had an overwhelming feeling of being at just the right place. 

When Fenris' tail slipped in between his legs and scales scraped against his underwear he wrapped his legs around Fenris' tail because oh fuck he wanted more of Fenris. More of the kisses, more of the strong arms caging him in on each of his sides to the rock ledge behind him. He wanted more than just tongue inside him and he wanted it from Fenris, very soon. 

"Fen." He gasped begging "Fen please." 

"What do you want Anders?" Fenris replied, his deep husky voice dripping of need. 

"You. Ah!" A roll by Fenris' tail cut him off with a soft moan. "You, you, you! Inside me. Please." He begged and wrapped his arms around Fenris' shoulders. "Please Fen take me? I want you to take me."

Fenris growled against his neck and bit down. Sharp teeth prickled the skin, not hard enough to break it but Anders hoped dearly there would be a mark there tomorrow and the day after that. Fenris moved one hand away from the rock behind Anders and stroke his fingers over Anders' chest. Anders wasn't very muscled, he was lanky and a bit thin to be honest, but the way Fenris touched him, Fenris didn't seem to dislike it. 

Fenris' fingers trailed down over his stomach, making his muscles twitch uncontrollably but in a very pleasant way. But they didn't stop there, Fenris' fingers continued down to the blue fabric of his cookie monster boxers and one finger slipped in under the waistline giving a small little tug.

"Off." Fenris growled with desire lacing the command.

It made Anders shiver in anticipation and excitement and he quickly unhooked his legs from Fenris' tail and shimmied to get out of them as quick as possible. For Fenris though it wasn't quick enough and the merman dove down in the water and tugged the offending fabric off by himself. Anders gasped and braced himself against the ledge behind him as he felt Fenris touch to his thighs. 

He held his breath as Fenris took his sweet time just touching and nosing around everywhere but where Anders longed to have him touch. Not that Anders was in a hurry, if Fenris wanted nothing but to just touch him like this that'd be fine for him. The fact that Fenris was at all touching him in any kind of way was excitement enough for Anders and-ah. 

He wasn't given any warning before the cold water around his dick was replaced by the sudden hot inside of Fenris' mouth and the swirling of a warm tongue. Fenris' tongue wasn't what he'd ever felt against his privates before, it was rough like a cat's tongue but to the maker damned void was it the best thing Anders had ever had touching his privates. 

Anders probably shouldn't have been as thrilled as he was over the sharp graze of pointed teeth stroking over his shaft. But bloody hell, he was. Fenris was trying different wicked techniques and had quickly found the ones that just disengaged Anders' ability of being quiet. When a finger slipped along his crack, teasing his hole Anders slipped off the ledge with a surprised yelp. His arms having temporarily turned into jelly.

Fenris was quickly there though, having pulled off his cock and pushed him roughly back up against the ledge and licked a long trail across his chest until they met in a searing hot kiss. 

"Turn around?" Fenris murmured against his lips.

Anders didn't even hesitate a second before he quickly shifted around, accepting as Fenris pushed him up until Anders' chest was sprawled out over the ledge. This way he wouldn't accidentally slip back into the water if his arms turned into jelly again. He did have a clue about what would happen when Fenris positioned his legs to different rocks against the wall until Anders' legs were promptly spread apart. 

Or at least he thought he had known what Fenris intended to do. He had expected fingers, especially when Fenris had grabbed both his ass cheeks and spread them apart. What he hadn't expected was to be bitten at the left one or the tongue that pressed into him shortly after without warning.

He yelped over the bite and cried out in pleasure over the tongue. Barely able to wrap his head around that Fenris was working his ass like if it was some flawless dessert. Or how they had gone from barely not touching at all to all the touching at once. If he had known this would happen if when he jumped into the water with Fenris he'd have done it weeks ago. 

He moaned loudly when Fenris dove deeper, faster, curling that tongue and...

"Yes! Fen! Fen! Yes!" 

Fenris had found and was now mercilessly stroking his tongue against his prostate and the world was crazily turned upside down and every other angle at once in the toe curling sensation. More so than how it had been turned in that kiss earlier. When a webbed hand grasped his hard on firmly around his hip, he was reduced to a moaning blabbering idiot. 

But he knew he was getting close, and he didn't want to finish until Fenris was inside him, filling him up and pounding into him like it was meant to be. Because he knew how that was how it was meant to be, he could feel it all the way to his toes.

"Fen! Please, need you inside." He panted, buckling his hips, uncertain if they should go forwards towards the hand or backwards to the tongue.

Fenris growled low in his throat in a cursed sexy manner that did all kinds of things to Anders' body, before he pulled back and all but flipped Anders around to his back and pressed him up further on the mossy ledge. It didn't take long before the merman had dragged himself up to Ander's chest, bracing himself on one arm so he hoovered over Anders, the white hair falling down over his shoulder and pooling down on the ground, mingling with Anders' blond hair.

They kissed again, hot and heavy, Anders able to taste himself at Fenris' tongue before he felt the head of Fenris' cock line with his entrance, Anders' own cock weeping locked between their abdomens. He briefly wondered where exactly Fenris had been hiding his cock but that thought flew out the window as Fenris slowly pressed into him. 

It was tight and hot and slightly painful and with edges he hadn't felt before with any human, but so fucking right that his toes curled. His head fell back, ripping a loud moan from him, mingling with the deep moan from Fenris and Anders wrapped his legs back against Fenris' tail to have something to cling to.

"Fen, Fen, Fen." Was all he managed to gasp out, like a mantra, following the small jagged rolls Fenris did with his hips as he rocked into Anders, filling him up so good. 

Anders was very soon moaning for more and Fenris was all to happy to give it, ramming into Anders with vigor while Anders was moaning Fenris' name loudly. Fenris was far from as noisy as Anders was about this, but the deep breathless moans of Anders' name against his lips between sloppy kisses were more than enough to sate Anders concerns of not being good enough.

When Fenris reached one hand in between them, stroking Anders in speed with the thrusts Anders knew it would be over very soon, no matter if he wanted it or not. 

"Fenris! Fenris! I will... ah! Fen, I can't, love." He gasped needy. "I have to..."

"Come for me Anders." Fenris growled possessive and dove in for a deep passionate kiss. 

The pounding deep into his ass, the hand wrapped around his cock and Fenris' lips against his own proved too much for Anders and the coiling heat made his body tense, shake and arch off the ground with a loud cry as white ropes of cum painted their stomachs and Fenris' hand.

He heard the muffled loud growl and felt the prickle of sharp pain as Fenris bit down at his shoulder, filling him up with lovely, lovely Fenris spend through the white noise of his high before Fenris collapsed on his chest. Anders jut felt complete, like if he'd accomplished some kind of life goal. 

They laid there in complete silence for a long while. The only sound in the cave was the soft humming of the lyrium above their heads and their mingled panting that was slowly turning into calm breaths as they slowly came down from their highs. Anders had mind enough to slip them to their sides and bundle Fenris close to himself. Whining slightly in protest over Fenris slipping out of him but content in just being able to cuddle close to Fenris as sleep quickly was gaining on him.

"I love you." He mumbled muffled to Fenris' hair.

"I am yours." Was the mumbled reply he heard from Fenris before he smiling fell asleep.


	11. A diver and a merman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawke is having a good day, until he isn't and Leto is in danger.
> 
> (LeHaw chapter)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings:  
> *Injuries  
> *blood  
> *blood loss

His talk with Merrill and Isabela had been a good one. He had explained that what they had, their relationship, didn't feel entirely right for him. And they had understood. He had even admitted there was someone else that had caught his interests and again, they understood. In fact, both Merrill and Isabela had known for some time that this was coming, they had just been waiting for him to realize it himself. 

There wasn't any ill will between them, they were all still friends and they had chatted long into the night about a lot of things. Leto included. Isabela had informed him that he juts needed to let them meet with Leto some day. They both wanted to meet the man that had swept Hawke off his feet so completely.  _"Awh look at you, you talk as if he made the sea himself. It's adorable. You must let us meet with him."_ Was what exactly Isabela had said.

He just imagined what they'd say if he had let them know that Leto actually was a merman. But he had kept that part to himself.

But it had been nice to chat with them. To have that off his chest was like if he finally could breath after a very long and persistent cold. He had such a long time avoiding and feeling uncomfortable around them that a night where he was actually enjoying himself with them in his company, felt like a blessing. He hadn't realized how trapped he had felt by his relationship until he was out of it. 

That's probably why he had woken up in a really good mood this morning. He hadn't even been bothered when Carver loudly complained over something school related while he made waffles. Nor did he get annoyed when he nearly fell over Trouble as the large mabari was camping by his feet in hope of getting a waffle. 

He was a bit concerned over the fact that Anders hadn't answered the three texts he had sent yesterday though. But he supposed Anders had a lot to do in the clinic. It wasn't unheard of that Justice asked Anders to stay and help, resulting in Anders staying to help too much and finally fell asleep in his examination room.

Though, his worry got worse when he found Anders' car in the parking lot by the pond but there was no Anders to be seen anywhere around. 

But then again, both him and Anders was dating two sea living people, Fenris could simply have dragged him out for a swim elsewhere he supposed. He'd ask Leto if he happened to know where his brother and possibly Anders were before giving in for actual worry.

However all thought about Anders was thrown out a window when he saw the familiar green and orange in the water. Not because Leto always made him forget about everything else, but because the merman really seemed to struggle while he swam, and the water was colored red around him. 

Hawke was in the water in a heartbeat. He didn't even care to get his phone out of his pockets, he just jumped in and waded over to Leto until he could pull him close. Leto let out a pained noise and clung to him in an instant with fear in his eyes. Not fear of Hawke, but of something else and Hawke wasn't about to have them both staying in the water to find out what. Instead he carried Leto through the water with ease and back up on land towards his car.

Leto clutched one arm against his own chest while the other one was tightly wrapped around Hawke's shoulders. Hawke who wasn't certain where Leto was injured had decided bridal style was the easiest way to carry him and he felt Leto's tail lamely slap against his leg with each step he took. 

"Just hang in there baby, I'll fix you up alright." Hawke promised, maybe more to himself than to Leto, he just really needed Leto to be fine. What would he ever do without his boyfriend? "You'll be okay."

Carrying Leto back to the car was the easy part, getting him inside and wrap him up with help of the first aid kit was harder. For once, he wasn't certain where all injuries were, Leto's tail had grown red and sleek by blood on the way to the car. Secondly he didn't have enough bandage in the first aid kit to be able to bandage up all of Leto's tail.

With some searching and prodding he managed to find the worst damage and wrap it. The places he wasn't entirely certain about he wrapped up with his jacket and his t-shirt. He could buy new jackets and t-shirts after all. The priority was making sure to stop the bleeding and get Leto to...  **fuck** Anders was still missing. Change of plans, he needed to get Leto back home and call for Isabela for emergency stitching. 

Isabela was by no means any doctor, but she had quick and steady fingers and had done a nice job that time Hawke had gotten a bottle over his eyebrow and split it. Because he couldn't exactly take Leto to a doctor. They'd just take him and make tests on him and Hawke could never allow that to happen. 

"Makers breath Leto, what happened to you?" He asked as he secured his t-shirt around the blooded tail.

The fact that Leto was making pained noises and desperate whimpers made Hawke's blood boil and his stomach feel like ice all at once. The need to protect and keep safe was overwhelming and he couldn't remember feeling it so strongly before. All he wanted to do was to find whatever or whoever had hurt Leto and make sure that they couldn't hurt him ever again.

"Diver." Leto choked out. "Hawke. It hurts." 

"Hey, I'll fix it okay? We'll fix it and I'll keep you safe." He said and kissed Leto softly on his forehead. His car, himself, Leto, and pretty much everything they touched got smeared by merman blood but Hawke didn't care. He could clean it when Leto was fine again, or buy a new car, it wasn't as if he was low on money.

When he was sure Leto was sitting as safe and comfortable as possible he didn't waste any time in starting up the car and getting them both back to his place. This really wasn't the ideal way to bring your boyfriend home for the first time and Hawke was just happy he wouldn't have to worry about Bethany or Carver getting home for several hours. He really wasn't sure how either of them would react to a bleeding injured merman in the house. 

Leto squeaked in surprise when the car set into motion but nothing more. The silence scared Hawke the most because during the time he had been with Leto, Leto had had a hard time to be quiet, or stop touching absolutely everything. Now he just sat in the back of the car, curled up on himself as much as he possibly could with his temporary emergency bandaged tail. 

Halfway home he called Isabela and asked her to come over to the estate with whatever first aid emergency things she owned and be quick about it. She didn't ask any questions, or maybe Hawke didn't give her time to do so as he hung up the moment she had said okay. But he knew she'd be there in twenty minutes. Him and Anders would be there in about fifteen. 

As he had guessed, fifteen minutes later they were in the garage and Hawke somehow managed to pull Leto out with minimum damage and carried him up and straight for his own bathroom. It was the room with the biggest tub, one that fit for more than one person and he easily lowered Leto down into it and turned on the hose to keep Leto wet. He wasn't certain how long mermen would make it without water. 

He made it easier for both of them by sitting inside the tub with Leto in his lap, it gave him the best reach to wash the tail with the gentle beam of water but also allowed for Leto to be able to lean back and relax as much as he could. Isabela still had her own key so she could let herself in when she arrived. 

"I've got you Leto." He said softly and kissed on his shoulder. "I've got a friend coming, she'll make sure you're stitched up alright. But I need you to tell me if the water is too hot or too cold. Can you do that for me?" 

"Warmer." Leto rasped out with a sniffle as his head lolled back against Hawke's shoulder and his face nuzzled against Hawke's neck. "I am cold." 

Hawke smiled gently and made the water heat up slightly more but made sure not to make it too hot, he didn't want to accidentally add burns to the list of injuries. He didn't unwrap the package of a tail either, he didn't dare to, he knew the importance of keeping blood inside the body and not outside. Right now, the cloth was keeping Leto's blood on the inside. 

"Here we go sweets." He said gently and washed the gentle rays of water up over Leto's chest. "All better. You'll be fine, I promise." 

"Hawke." Leto mumbled tiredly. 

"Right here."

"I've made blood on your shirt." Leto muttered against his neck. "Blood shirt."

Hawke kissed on Leto's forehead and prayed Isabela would hurry up. He knew that rambling because of blood loss wasn't a very good sign and in worst case he'd have to give it a try himself to stitch Leto back up and that would leave terrible scars. But scars were preferable to death...

Luckily it didn't have to go that far as he heard they keys in the door and Isabela's voice calling out for him. He sighed in relief and simply shouted to her that they were up in his bathroom. It took about ten seconds for her to get up there and when she did she just stood in the door for a couple of more seconds just staring at the sight of Hawke, or rather Leto. 

But only for a couple of seconds. Then she got down on the floor by the edge of the tub pulling out the things she needed from her bag. Merrill showed up just moments later with a couple of potions in her hands and she stopped to stare for only a moment or two before she came over as well. Merrill and Isabela began working on the makeshift bandages and Hawke focused on keeping the water running and making Leto actually drink one of the potions.

Which proved to be difficult as Leto began hissing about it tasting bad and shift around unhappily as he tried to get away from Hawke and the potion. Leto refused drinking it until Hawke took a sip himself and swallowed. First then did Leto reluctantly swallowed down the red liquid while making a disgusted face. 

"Shit, what happened to him?" Isabela asked with a frown as she began cleaning one of the deeper wounds with some alcohol before she began stitching them back together.

"I don't know, he just said diver." Hawke said with a sigh. 

"A diver with a knife." Isabela huffed angry. "Shit, what kind of diver stabs a merman? Doesn't they know that means bad luck? Like wrath of the ocean bad luck?" 

"They weren't so deep though, he won't have any big scars so that's good for him." Merrill said as she rubbed a poultice over the place where Isabela had stitched. 

Leto groaned unhappy and the tail twitched sadly as the two women worked on it. Hawke just wrapped his arm a bit tighter around Leto's chest and breathed in his hair as he made sure to continue keeping his body from drying out. All he needed was for Leto not to bleed out in his bathtub, he wanted Leto to smile and question everything again. 

But he had to admit, it looked a lot better now that the tail was cleaned of blood and the wounds proved to be smaller than he'd feared. Also Isabela was as skilled as he remembered it and quick and easy closed each and every one of the wounds while Merrill was rubbing them with the poultices to make them heal faster. If they were lucky, Leto'd be himself in just a few days. 

But at the same time he had an uncomfortable nagging thought of  _what if he hadn't been there._ What then? He had been so close to loose Leto today, if he had just been a bit late or decided to do something else. What if Leto hadn't been able to make it all the way to the pond? Then Hawke couldn't have saved him, wouldn't even have known that Leto would have died. 

He wasn't sure what he'd do without Leto, he was just sure he didn't want to find it out. He took a deep breath to calm his storming emotions and mumbled quiet promises in Leto's ear. He vowed he'd always be there to protect him, to keep Leto safe and out of harm. He'd find a place where Leto could swim free and safe both at once. 

"This is Leto isn't it?" Isabela asked with a knowing smile. "He'll be fine Hawke. He'll need sleep but he'll be fine." She promised. 

Hawke nodded and swallowed hard. "Yes, he's Leto, I met him with Anders, he touched me and... Well." Hawke glanced down at the flowing soft lines in green black and orange over his heart shaping a seahorse. His mark. "It just happened, I wouldn't change it for anything." He admitted quietly. 

"A soul bond? Between a merman and a human?" Merrill said curiously. "I've heard of them." 

"You lucky dog, Hawke. You deserve it. I hope you realize that you'll have to let us talk to him when he's better though." Isabela said with a little laugh. 

"Yeah. He'll be happy to bombard you with questions." He assured. 

As Isabela worked on the last stitches, the ones on Leto's arm the merman twitched awake from the unconscious state he had fallen into and made an unhappy sound and flopped the tail in something Hawke would only guess to be agitation. He pressed a kiss to his temple to remind him he was still there and Leto huffed and leaned in against his touch again. 

"It's too hot." Leto mumbled tiredly. 

"Oh, Sorry Le." he murmured gently.

He really should have realized that the water was a bit too hot now that Leto was keeping the blood inside his body instead of bleeding it all out but he had been too occupied thinking about everything he hadn't even noticed. He quickly changed it down to a more comfortable temperature, or rather a bit more from what Hawke remembered of the temperature of the pond.

Leto easily drifted back asleep and together with Merrill and Isabela he cleaned off any trace of blood before he slowly got up from the tub and put the plug in and filled it with water. It felt a bit odd to fill the tub and leave someone under the surface, but it wasn't like Leto would drown and Hawke guessed he'd be a lot more comfortable if he got to sleep under water than on Hawke's bed for example. 

A few things was for sure. One; He was utterly exhausted and so was Isabela and Merrill. Two; He owed both of them a lot of answers. Three; Leto was in his house. Four; Leto would be perfectly fine.

Five; Varric would so write a book about this. 


	12. A day by the pool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leto wakes up in the Hawke estate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Hawke and Leto chapter again) 
> 
> Next chapter will be back to Fenders :)

Leto didn't remember much of the whole ordeal when he woke back up in Hawke's tub.

What he did remember was doing the usual things, the things he did everyday, like swimming, minding his own business and searching for pretty shells and rocks. The ocean had been the same as it had always been, wide, blue and full of fish. He remembered that there hadn't been a sign of Fenris. He remembered guessing that either Fen was with Anders, or he was hunting, the things his twin usually did.

But he also remembered the odd thing of the day; there had been two divers.

He had been on his way to the pond, having a feeling he'd find Hawke there and whenever he had a feeling about Hawke, he knew to follow. That's when he had spotted them. They were dressed in their black odd clothes with their air tanks strapped to their backs. Divers weren't new for Leto, he had seen them before but always kept at a safe distance. But this time, one of them had clearly been stuck and had struggled in panic against whatever he had been trapped in. 

Leto wouldn't usually have done anything, just have swam on and left the land dweller to it's own fate. But he had needed to get into the pond and the two were in the way, also he hadn't been able to stop thinking  _'What if it had been Hawke.'_ Anders and Hawke were some of the nicest people he knew and they were both land dwellers, he had been confident that this diver would be happy for the help to get free from his confinement.

For his effort, the only thing Leto had been given was a knife slashing against him.

Leto remembered a quick escape, being in pain and swimming through the hurt, he had only known he needed to get to Hawke because Hawke was safe. He vaguely remembered finding Hawke and the relief when Hawke promised he was safe, but after that, things got hazy and he just remembered bits and pieces flying past him.

He briefly remembered Hawke's blood stained shirt around his tail. He didn't remember how he got into Hawke's tub but he remembered being held close to Hawke's chest. He remembered the two women and the disgusting drink Hawke had made him consume. He remembered being pinched over and over by something sharp in his tail but feeling better for every prickle.

Then he didn't know or remember anything but nightmares and dreams for a long time. Not until he had woken up and found himself in Hawke's tub. 

He had felt a lot better upon waking up. His tail ached and protested against bending movements but it was no longer that screaming pain it had been the day before and it no longer was bleeding.

He had been delighted to find that Hawke was sleeping just beside the tub on a mattress on the floor and had spent a long time of that morning just watching Hawke drool into his own beard. 

When Hawke had finally woken up they spent a really nice amount of time just kissing and Hawke mumbling sweet words to him that made him blush and giggle. Then Hawke had gotten him what he called a sandwich for breakfast. Leto had to admit it was tasty but he still preferred food that came from the ocean. He just didn't quite understand the flavor of what Hawke called cheese. 

After breakfast, Hawke had carried him out of the tub and out to a square pool with clear water in. It wasn't as large as he was used to, but it was large enough for him to swim back and forth and stretch out his tail in difference of the bent and curled position he'd been forced to keep it in while sitting and laying in Hawke's tub. Here he could also sink down to the bottom and feel the comfortable soft familiar pressure around him from a safe amount of water surrounding him. 

Around mid day, the two women that he vaguely remember to have patched him up came by with a third woman who looked a lot like Hawke, but younger and softer and a lot less hairy. He had spent a long time just laying on the floor of the pool, watching them before he decided they weren't a threat and hesitantly joined them by the surface. 

Hawke introduced them as Isabela, she was the one with white tight dress and pretty gold jewelries. Merrill, a woman with a green dress and pointed ears, like his own. And Bethany, the one who looked a bit like Hawke and apparently was his younger sister.

When the initial weariness of the land dwellers slipped away he found that he liked them. They let him touch and ask questions as much as he wanted and he spent a long time on examining their hairlessness. Hawke had  hair from his head to his feet and these women didn't seem to have any hair at all except for what was on their heads and their eyebrows.

It was a bit like how male mer generally had a bit more scales trailing just a little higher up on their abdomens and how male mers always had a lot more color than female mer. It had to do with the nature of what fishes they shared resemblances with. Their mother had been more brown to color and Varania's tail was a murky kind of green with silver blue splotches on. 

If Hawke had a tail it would be like a lionfish. The two wavy horizontal lines, the odd symbol and the two vertical lines on the top of his hand were all red with a white lining on them and that was his mark. When Hawke had seen it he had chuckled and showed Leto it's match on Hawke's left arm, he had told a story about teenage rebellion and getting a tattoo and how it was one of Hawke's favorite things on his entire body. 

But right now, he was paying extra attention to Merrill and her ears. He hadn't known the land dwellers could have their ears pointed, just like his own ears. That they could have wider eyes like his own or that they could look so much like him. In fact all missing on Merrill was a long sleek tail and she'd easily have been another river mer. Not all mer had pointed ears of course, some had rounded, just like Hawke, but no mer had beards. 

As he had been touching and stroking Merrill's ears, checking her middle for any hidden scales and tried to make sense of the woman who called herself an elf, he had noticed how Hawke had grown rather stiff and how his replies to Isabela and Bethany had became shorter and shorter as they spoke. At first it hadn't been very notable and Leto had dismissed it as nothing, but it was getting more and more obvious. 

Leto could guess why, he had understood land dwellers weren't as much for touch as mer were. He had to admit that it was strange to him how they all got to know each other and how they lived so close without touch. But he could understand that Hawke didn't feel very comfortable with how close Leto was getting to Merrill and he wasn't planning on torturing him longer than needed.

With a soft hum he dove down in the water and swam in a slow leisurely speed around the pool, aimed for Hawke and increased the speed. With a little help from his arms and hands he pushed and pulled himself quickly out of the water with minimum effort and with a slosh of water ended up almost perfectly in Hawke's lap, making all of him wet in the process.

Hawke though didn't complain but instead just quickly wrapped both his arms around Leto and tugged him more comfortably into his lap. Leto adjusted his tail to lay it in a more comfortable position over Hawke's knee while he leaned his upper body against Hawke and raked one hand through Hawke's chest hair with a smile. 

"Too much hair? You know I can shave it off." Hawke mumbled sheepishly. "I mean, if you want me to."

"Four years and he never offered me that." Isabela said with a dramatic sigh, making Bethany and Merrill giggle.

Leto ignored them in favor of stroking his hand up over Hawke's neck and into the beard. He actually liked all Hawke's hair. It was so different from what he was used to but he liked it a lot. From what was on Hawke's head and face to down on his feet. It made Hawke... well, Hawke and Leto loved Hawke. Besides, the beard tickled when Hawke kissed him, he liked that too.

"I like the hair." He hummed happily. "It's you and I like you as you are."

Hawke grinned widely and kissed him square at the lips and Leto happily wrapped his arms around Hawke's wide impressive shoulders. He didn't want Hawke to change anything about himself, especially not because of him. Well, admittedly he wouldn't mind to see Hawke in a tail, just once, but Hawke's legs were very nice and Leto would very much miss the beard. 

"You were jealous." He purred softly against Hawke's lips.

"No! Well... maybe... yeah." Hawke admitted sheepishly. "I mean, I just really like you and well... I know it's not the same for you touching people but..."

Leto snickered lightly and bumped his forehead to Hawke's in a reassuring manner. He was done touching the others anyway and the one he really wanted to touch was the man who was holding him close in his lap right now. The fact that Hawke had been jealous was actually kind of cute. To an extent, he was still a mer and Hawke would have to learn that for him, touching others didn't mean the same thing. 

But that was for later. Time probably would make Hawke more comfortable and secure with what they had and Leto could just carry on as usual.

"Then sit closer to the edge, I can't reach you when you sit far away." He hummed happily. "They have too little hair anyway and you are mine." 

"Oh, does that mean you are mine too? Oh! I will guard you, Like a dragon!" Hawke said excitedly and squeezed him closer to his chest.

"Hawke!" Leto was struggling to keep himself from laughing by Hawke's childishness. But it was getting difficult.

"I shall eat passers by and demand virgin sacrifices." Hawke continued with a grin and dove in and bit him at his shoulder playfully.

"Even dragons eventually gets slain Hawke!" He chided and tried to squirm away.

"Nah, not this dragon." Hawke assured with a laugh. "Well, maybe by your brother... he'll slay me for taking you here won't he?"

"Fen is busy mating Anders right now, he won't notice in two or three more days." 

Leto who had forgotten all about the fact that he wasn't sitting there alone with Hawke, jumped startled when someone choked on their drink beside them. He swiveled his head to look at the three women and blushed when he realized they were all staring at him. At first he didn't get what he had said to cause such a reaction, then he realized that maybe land dwellers didn't have a mating cycle after a match. 

But that didn't make sense either, how did there get more land dwellers if they didn't get each other filled up with guppies? All races in the seas made guppies with each other. That, and eating was something they all shared, it was the universal truth. Or so he had thought anyway until just about a few seconds ago. 

He did know that at least Hawke had the part for it, he had felt it while at several occasions while trailing his hands all over Hawke while mapping him out. He knew that Hawke's part stiffened by touch just like his own would, even if his own was hidden in a slit in his tail. Surely the land dwellers didn't just walk around ignoring it all the time? 

At least for merpeople there was a primal need and perhaps Leto hadn't sated it with anyone else before, but he had sated it with his own fist and knew if felt really good. He had imagined doing it with others, once even with Hawke and the thought had been so good it had made him come almost right away. But if the land dwellers didn't act on those needs... did that mean that Hawke would never touch him that way?

"With mating... do you mean..?" Hawke slowly began. Clearly eluding to the right thing.

"Making guppies." Leto said in relief. At least Hawke seemed to know about it. "But Fen isn't the kind of mer that can carry guppies, we're river mers, only our women can carry guppies so unless Anders can, they will mate for a few days before the urge goes away." 

"Two more days? No way. No one can keep it up for that long." Isabela said but was eyeing Leto in a slightly uncomfortable way.

Leto shifted slightly to get safer in Hawke's arms as if it would save him from Isabela's looks. Well, he was fairly certain Hawke wouldn't let her touch him in anyway inappropriate so he supposed it was the safest place to be sitting while talking about this. Clearly the humans did act on the urges but it seemed to go very quick for them. 

"Some mer mate up to two weeks if they are incapable of having guppies before the instincts give up. It happens when there is a match and nesting." Leto said with a shrug. 

"What about eating? And sleeping? And working, people would notice if they were gone so long wouldn't they?" Merrill asked confused

"A lot of naps and quick hunts. Merpeople don't work like you do, nesting and mating is more important than doing anything else." 

"So... Anders has spent the closest three days getting laid?" Isabela asked with a smirk. "Waaaaiiit, does every merman do that? Damn it Hawke that is going to be so unfair!"

Hawke flushed and Leto squeaked hiding his face to Hawke's shoulder. He would mate with Hawke one day, the fact that Hawke had practically nested him by bringing him here, a place where they could both co-exist was part of that. Knowingly or not, Hawke had taken the first step in nesting him. But first Leto's tail would have to heal and he would not want anyone else this close while doing it, but...

He really was glad he wouldn't have to just imagine Hawke's touches when the day would come. 

"Bela! Don't..." Hawke groaned loudly. "That's so none of your business." 

"Yes please refrain. When my brother takes several days off just _'_ _missing'_ I prefer believing he was hit by a car." Bethany agreed with Hawke. 

"Hmm, come on kitten we have to take time off from work. We have something to do." Isabela said and quickly got up. "You want to join us Bethany? I've got a theory about the Hawke family and-"

"No." Hawke said before she could finish. "Not with my sister you don't."

Merrill giggled and got up as well to follow Isabela. Leto noticed how Bethany looked up and down Isabela's body as he peeked up from Hawke's shoulder. But she just laughed lightly and shook her head.

"Sorry, I have an essay to write, another time." Bethany said with a wink. 

Hawke groaned and Leto snickered where he had his face buried against Hawke's shoulder again. Land dwellers didn't have nesting and mating periods apparently, but clearly they still did the act. He had to admit he was curious of how Hawke looked without anything covering him. He had touched but not actually seen and he had a feeling land dwellers were different from mer down there. 

One day, he'd find out for his very own. 


	13. Flemeth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders and Fenris goes on an adventure, someone unexpected shows up.

When Fenris woke up it had finally been with the feeling of content fulfillment. The feeling that he had finally managed to do what he had been chasing all week even if he logically knew that neither him nor Anders was carrying anyone's guppies even if they had been cock deep in each others bodies for days now. He said days, because he wasn't certain of the precise number. 

Fenris had lost concept of time between the eternal glow from the lyrium veins above their heads and the activity he'd been up to with Anders. They had fucked and they had napped and a few times Fenris had hunted down a couple of fishes that Anders had roasted in a blast of magic then they had repeated the process until they had fallen into actual asleep some hours ago. 

To be perfectly honest, Fenris hadn't planned to have  sex with Anders this soon. He hadn't even planned on kissing him back  in the pond. But then he had wanted to touch Anders, the way Leto could touch Hawke, the way any mer touched their match. He had known that would only happen under water and well, one thing had lead to the next and somewhere along the line he had thought it was a good idea to show this place for Anders. 

But then Anders' soft skin had looked so inviting in the blue light and the kisses had felt so nice. Touching Anders had felt right and painless. Quickly, once again, one thing had turned into another, and now they laid sprawled out together on the moss growing on the ledge of the rocky cave floor. Anders had his head positioned over Fenris' chest along with one hand resting on his shoulder and one leg slung over his tail.

Fenris was resting his own arms one under his head where he laid on his back and the other wound around Anders with his hand in the golden hair. His fin was comfortably dipped down into the cooling dark water over the ledge providing him with the safety of knowing how close the water was if he needed to dive. A smile was playing on his lips as he kept his eyes closed, just enjoying the time with his blond match. 

With every breath Anders took, Fenris could feel the human's chest expand against his side. For every breath there was a warm little huff of soft warm breath, reminding that Anders really was there, that it wasn't just a nice imagination and the trick of water washing over his skin. Anders was actually there and Fenris could touch him, without any pain. 

He liked this, he liked being this close to Anders, he liked knowing Anders was safe.

But as all good things, he knew it would end soon. Sooner rather than later, Anders would have to return to his life above the surface where Fenris couldn't follow. No matter how much Fenris wished the other could stay, he knew it was impossible. Knew it was selfish to even think the thought that maybe there'd be a way for Anders to be happy under the sea with him. 

With a sigh, he shifted slightly to drift back asleep. Better to enjoy the time he had left than to worry about what would happen afterwards. At least this once.

However, when Fenris drifted back towards the land of dreams a gut wrenching feeling caught him in it's tight grasp and he had the highly uncomfortable feeling of being pulled up from the ground and twirled around in quick air. All he saw when he tried to pry his eyes open were whirling white and he lost all track of his sense of direction until everything stopped and he fell flat to the ground. 

Not the bottom of the sea, but the actual ground, on land.

He pushed himself up into a sitting position with the help of his arms and looked around himself in confusion. If there was one thing he was absolutely certain about it was that this was no dream of his. Any dreaming he did occurred in water, if a dream did occur on land, it would have been the nightmare of being strapped to a table on land in a clean room with sharp shining knives on the walls. 

But neither Danarius or Hadriana were anywhere to be seen. This wasn't a clean lab and there was no shiny knives in sight. 

He was  actually sitting in a misty wasteland with dead trees and plants in seemingly the middle of an old courtyard perhaps. He had seen an old ruin of the land dwellers once. It had been claimed by the sea, but the wolf statues had been the same. What was off with this place were all the mirrors, wherever he turned his head, there was another mirror. 

None of these mirrors seemed to be in any condition to work as they were meant to though. They were either broken, dark or none reflective, standing tall over him where he sat on the ground.  

As he sat there, trying to find any source of water he could escape to, one of the mirrors flared up in a shimmering blue. Fenris' first thought was that it looked very much like water and he slowly began dragging himself towards it. In water, his tail was made for speed and flexibility, without it, it was a heavy dead weight that he had absolutely no use of whatsoever. 

He grit his teeth as the ground rasped painfully against his markings, but refused to acknowledge it. He needed to get out of there and that blue shimmering seemed his best option. 

But before he could reach the mirror someone stumbled through it from the other side and practically fell straight over him. Fenris growled and his markings lit up on instinct to fend off the person who had fallen over him and get to the shimmering mirror, but it was too late. The mirror flickered and turned back into an inanimate object as if it never had been acting up in the first place.

He turned his attention to the person above him but already knew who it was, there was just one human he felt that comfortable around and it was with Anders. Anders who shifted around until he sat up straight, straddling Fenris' already aching tail and quite frankly, not making it better at all. 

"Andraste's knickerweasles! What in the void just happened?" 

"Anders." Fenris grunted, trying to get the blond's attention.

"Fen? This is such an odd dream. Oh well, I've had weirder." Anders hummed and leaned in, kissing his lips happily. 

Fenris grunted a small protest but then just sighed and allowed the kiss. They needed to figure out what was going on, but he really had a hard time saying no when it came to kissing Anders. But as Anders tried to apply tongue Fenris pulled back, there was time for kisses once they woke up and if they were in actual trouble he didn't think it wise to be caught with Anders wrapped and bouncing over his tail.

"Anders. Something's wrong." He said and sighed. 

"This place is a bit odd I agree but-"

"Anders you aren't dreaming. Please get off my tail." He sighed tiredly. 

"Fen? Wait... Fenris? Is that you? Like, you, you? Not just a dream you?" Anders asked surprised. 

"Yes, tail." 

"Oh... oh shit, sorry!"

Anders quickly scrambled off his tail and took a spot beside him on the ground instead. Fenris sighed and rubbed his forehead before looking around again. He was still sitting in that odd wasteland of mirrors, the only difference was that he now sat there with Anders. But since Anders had legs, they now had a chance to explore for a way out. 

"Is this some merman thing? Like have really nice sex, then share dreaming?" Anders asked curiously. 

"If it was, don't you believe there would be water?" Fenris asked with a sly smile. 

"Riiight. Sorry, never mind me. But I suppose... could it be some kind of demon? Trapping us here? Maybe sloth?" Anders suggested. 

Fenris frowned and looked around once again. He didn't like that thought at all. Danarius had been in pact with demons, demons and blood magic. What Fenris understood of demons, for a demon to have any power, they needed to be accepted in by their host and he didn't remember accepting anything and Anders had thought they were both sleeping so that didn't seem very likely either.

"You came here through a mirror." Fenris pointed out and motioned for said mirror. 

"I did? I just remember feeling like I was kind of thrown around like a glove and feeling sick, then I fell over you." Anders said thoughtfully. 

Fenris looked back the way he'd dragged himself from. There was a mirror there too, he just hadn't thought of it. He must have come from one as well as Anders. Then maybe the mirrors were the thing that would transport them back. Or wake them up? He wasn't entirely certain if they were actually here or not since they had both been sleeping, or at least been very close to sleeping. 

He was just about to suggest that Anders should go and investigate when the mist began twirling around and soon had created a solid point, a person, a land dweller woman. She stepped through the mist as if she had always been there and as if she not had just materialized from nothing.

The woman had long metal boots that went well up on her leather clad thighs. She wore a tight leather outfit with a long leather cape, feather pauldrons and metal gauntlets. Her hair was white and in a do that looked as if she had shaped them after the horns of a dragon. Yellow quick eyes locked at the two of them and Fenris was at once set on edge, uncertain if he had any fighting abilities on land. 

"Well, well, what have we here." She said, amusement playing in her voice. "One of the people, and a human. How unexpected." 

Anders jumped startled and twirled to look at the woman, but stayed close to Fenris and Fenris just sat tense. He had evaluated their chances and even with magic, they wouldn't win this fight. Anders was mainly a healer and this woman... she was powerful beyond what Fenris had ever met before. Better not make an enemy of her would they not need to. 

"Who are you?" Anders asked with wide eyes and Fenris could hear the slight panic in his voice. 

"Some call me Felmeth, Asha'bellanar, an old woman who talks too much." She said with a smile playing at her lips. "But somehow the people who fled to the seas still have remembered me as-"

"Mythal." Fenris said and felt his guard lower just the slightest. "Among my people we have legends of her and her kin. She is one of those who'm we pray to." 

"Wait, are you telling me that this is one of your... gods? I mean, I figured you weren't Andrastian but... your gods are humans?" Anders asked confused. 

"I... did not know she was a land dweller, no. We assume them as spirits." He admitted. 

Mythal laughed and they both looked to her. He wasn't sure what she was doing there, or rather what they were doing there. However, a cold settled in his guts, freezing them like the winter a shallow pond. He had prayed to be rid of this bond, to be rid of what held him to a land dweller, he had prayed to the spirits and he had prayed to the evanuris. But that had been before he actually met Anders. 

There was nothing in this world that made him want to loose Anders from his life, not now, not ever. He hadn't been with Anders for that long, but it was long enough for him to know that he didn't want to see Anders go. Even if the bond was cut, he would still like Anders, he would still want Anders in his life. Anders was kind, funny, very handsome and he looked at Fenris without petty, without fear. Anders looked at Fenris and Fenris felt like if he was actually pretty. 

If he lost Anders now, he'd loose the only chance of having someone who cared for him in that way. The only one who would look at him and not just see lyrium. If she broke the bond... Anders would be able to choose to live with another land dweller, choose to forget Fenris. And that scared him.

"Why are you here then?" Fenris heard Anders ask and tensed up again. Waiting for the ending blow. 

"Now isn't that a good question lad?" The woman said with a little chuckle. "You did not choose the bond upon you, but you choose to complete what binds you. There is nothing to be done of what has already been made but it can be eased with choices. I will give to you, and ask only in return for you to place this where it belong." A small stone dragon statue appeared out of no where in Fenris' palm. "One of you know already where it is meant to be, but you will need each other to place it."

Fenris looked at the small statue and arched a brow. He had seen it's like before, but he didn't have time to finish his thoughts as a blue magical wave washed over them both, soaked them through their cores and Fenris shivered by the odd feeling. It wasn't cold, nor warm. Not wet but nor dry. Anders made a surprised startled yelp and looked as confused as Fenris felt. 

"What did you..." Anders began but was cut short.

"Now it is time for you both to return, this plane is not for mortals to linger." The woman said calmly but with a smile on her lips. "Good luck." 

Before there was any time for protests Fenris felt that gut wrenching feeling grab a hold of him once again and the world begun to spin. The white mist forced him to close his eyes and his fingers clenched tightly around the small statue that fit in his palm.

With a jerk he sat up straight. The world straightened itself, his tail still dipped in water and Anders jerked on top of his chest, bolting up with him. His legs still wrapped around Fenris' tail and for a moment they both just stared around, looking for any trace of what had just happened. Fenris slowly opened the hand that had clenched hard to the small stone dragon and stared at it.

Anders reached out and slowly stroke his fingers across the carved stone before dropping his head heavily against Fenris' shoulder.

"What do you think she did?" Anders asked quietly. 

"I don't know." Fenris said honestly. 

Whatever it was she had done, Fenris really hoped it wouldn't come back and bite them in the scales later. 


	14. The gift of Mythal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders and Fenris learns what the gift from Flemmeth is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have some fluff! Because I felt fluffy :) This chapter didn't cooperate with me at first and I've deleted it six times, but I am quite happy with it now! I hope you all will enjoy it too! :)

What exactly Mythal had done to them, the pair didn't get to know until they both were back in the water.

In fact right now, Anders was at the moment trying very not to scream in panic as the only thing keeping him from sinking like a rock to the bottom of the ocean was Fenris' strong muscled arms tightly wrapped around his middle. Both of them staring down wide eyed at the gift in shape of a bright icy blue tail where Anders' legs were very much supposed to be. 

They had both gotten into the water from the cave and everything had been as usual. Fenris had pulled him through the water of the dark cave to kiss him where there was more light, to prevent that Anders would have to be scared of the dark. But the change that should have happened, exploded into something neither of them had suspected. 

There had been the brief moment of searing pain, only lasting for a fraction of a second and when it had been over... Anders had found himself sinking, unable to make use of his legs. His arms had worked just fine and he'd been able to breath easier than when Fenris had taken him there, but his legs had just refused to make any sort of sense to him. 

It had taken him some seconds to realize why none of his muscles worked the way he was used to and why he needed Fenris to keep him from sinking, but then they were both staring down at the tail. 

It was different from Fenris' tail he noticed. Anders' tail was brighter, shorter and a lot thicker than Fenris' tail was. A wild thought rushed through his head  _What will Fenris think about a chubby tail? Was Anders counted as... fat?_ And that was really a thought that  **shouldn't** be among his top concerns, but there it was. What if Fenris didn't like his tail?

What if Fenris hated him for this? What if he left him for it? Anders couldn't even move like this, without Fenris he sank like a rock. The thought of Fenris leaving him just because he was useless with a tail was scaring him half to death and he felt panicked tears burn in his eyes making his sight blurry before the tears washed away in the water. 

"Focus on breathing so you always leave air in your lungs. It keeps you floating." Fenris instructed calmly, drawing him out of his downwards spiraling thoughts. 

"How am I supposed to do that!" He snapped angrily. He regretted it at once of course, Fenris was not to blame for this and the way Fenris looked like if Anders had hit him... Way to make Fenris really leave him. "I'm sorry... Fen I'm so scared." He admitted in a silent gasp. "Please don't go, I'm so sorry." 

He screwed his eyes shut and just stayed tense, waiting for Fenris to push him away and leave him to his fate to die on the bottom of the ocean. Alone and unloved, crying himself to his end. Because what else was he supposed to do? He had a tail he couldn't move, apparently he was breathing wrong, and he had no bloody way of knowing if it was even reversible. 

A gentle press of lips against his forehead, then his nose and finally on his lips prodded for his attention. He didn't open his eyes, but he melted into the now familiar feeling of something completely right. One of Fenris' hands locked gently against his cheekbone, the thumb stroke over his cheek and fingers brushed by his ear and down on his neck while the other arms remained a secure point around his hips, keeping him safe. 

When Fenris pulled back again from the soft kiss and bumped his forehead against Anders' own, Anders just sighed happily. He kept his eyes closed, now not because he would cry if he had them open, but because he was unable to open them while he was savoring the moment and enjoyed the soft tingle that was left on his lips by the kiss. 

"Breath like that." Fenris murmured gently to his lips. 

"What?" Anders asked confused and finally opened his eyes.

"Like that, breath like this and you float. Look." 

Fenris let his arms slip away and for a terrifying second Anders was sure he'd sink. But he didn't, he was suspended in mid water, neither sinking nor raising. Just the slightest movement up and down matching his breath, nothing worse than the tiny movement Fenris himself made. But the point was that he was no longer sinking worthlessly to the bottom. 

He stayed in that way for a little while, trying to figure what it was that he was doing differently and when he thought he had it, he took a deeper breath, felt himself float upwards, let it out, sank, and breathed regularly again and remained suspended.

Fenris just grinned and followed suit.

The panic quickly slipped away after that. What had just scared him out of his head seemed so silly. It was strange, usually it took a lot of time and coaxing to pull him out from an anxiety attack like that, but now it just washed away. It was as if it couldn't get a proper grip when the water was all around him, protecting him alongside Fenris. 

Giddiness took over and he repeated the pattern of floating up, down, stayed, up again, more down over and over. He yelped surprised when he sank several meters uncontrollably before remembering how to stop it. All the time Fenris followed him, ready to dive in whenever needed. 

Fenris of course moved at more ease, using his tail to follow and swim around Anders, now and then helped straighten Anders up or to stop him from sinking or rising too far and too quickly. 

However, seeing Fenris move so easily made Anders want to do that as well, and he started to look at Fenris' blue tail. "Fen, how do you..." He gave a little kick, or as he would have given a kick had it been his legs, only to find yet again how all his muscles were making absolutely no sense whatsoever and he found himself twirling until he suddenly was hanging upside down. 

Fenris chuckled, but quickly suffocated it behind his hand, pretending that he was just coughing. But Anders knew better and narrowed his eyes, sending Fenris a dirty look. Fenris was lucky he was so cute so he'd get away with absolutely anything. Fenris could probably kill someone, chuckle like that and go free from the cops on sheer cuteness. 

But, Anders had something more important to focus on, like trying to move himself back to the right direction. He could ask about help he supposed, but he wanted to figure this one out for himself. Or at least try enough times until there was no shame in surrendering. 

He tried another movement but only managed to push himself further down in the water, or rather, he would have ended further down in the water if Fenris' strong hands hadn't stopped him by gripping him by the end of his tail to hold him in place. When he tried to take advantage of Fenris' hands to spin around he instead accidentally managed to smack Fenris in the face with his frilly fin. 

It felt so odd when his fin came in contact with something else, he had up until now guessed that Fenris didn't really feel anything in the soft fins, but he had clearly been wrong. It wasn't uncomfortable, nor did it quite tickle, but it felt nice, it felt  _funny._ A good funny that made him giggle. 

Andraste's knickerweasles. Had he just actually  _giggled?_ Like a little school boy? What in the void was going on? 

"Anders! Stop squirming!" Fenris complained loudly.

Anders grinned, vengeance for the pretty merman chuckling at him for ending up upside down. He repeated the movement and slapped Fenris once again with his fin and Fenris groaned loudly and let his tail go. Anders yelped over how quick and sudden Fenris' face was also upside down with his and the white long hair flowed down under them, revealing the three dots at Fenris' forehead. 

Anders smiled as cute as he could manage for Fenris to take pity on him. 

"Hi Fen." He said with another little ridiculous giggle.  ~~ugh maker, what was up with that giggling?~~

"Hello Anders." Fenris replied with amusement in his voice and a shake of his head. 

Anders squeaked when he felt Fenris' tail wrap around his own. His tail was definitely a lot shorter and thicker than Fenris' was. He wondered why, because Anders certainly wasn't either chubby nor buff. He had always been lanky, a bit too much on the thin side with stick arms and  ribs poking out slightly. The scrawny kid in school and in the circle with no real muscles to talk about, or any fat. Yet his tail was... chubby. 

He was self conscious, he suddenly realized as he hung there upside down with Fenris so close to him. And when on earth did that happen? Why was he suddenly acting like a little school boy who got to spend time with his biggest crush? He was already together with Fenris, they had already touched... well, pretty much everything two men could touch with each other. There wasn't a centimeter of Fenris' Body that Anders' wasn't allowed to touch whenever he wanted. 

Fenris smiled at him, Anders pecked Fenris' lips and Fenris easily maneuvered both of their tails until they were turned back in the right direction. Anders showed his gratitude by slow kissing Fenris with a lot of tongue.

They stayed like that for a long time, tangled up and kissing, Fenris slowly beginning to show him by touch and demonstration what muscle to flex, how to bend, push and move to swim around in the ocean. Anders found that it was nothing like walking or even swimming with plastic fins. This was a whole new arrange of muscles and movements and learning how to make his body do what he wanted was a terribly slow process according to Anders.

He was surprised to find how quickly he had lost track of time, direction and regular human decency. They could have been there all between ten minutes and several hours, they could be close to the cave they had started by or swam across the whole ocean and he just couldn't stop brush against Fenris or stop stealing touches all over the other. It wasn't touching just because he liked to touch a handsome Fen either, it just felt right. Personal spheres had slowly become something foreign to him.

That and the fact that Fenris kept making him squeak and giggle, how excited he got by practically anything and how touch had turned into more of a second kind of language made Anders realize that maybe more than just his exterior had been altered. Maybe his minds had been changed as well, maybe merpeople really didn't think like humans elves and dwarves did. 

"Fen... Is this how you always feel touching people?" He asked after a while and laced their fingers together. 

"How do you mean?" Fenris asked and pulled Anders' hand up and kissed on it softly. 

Anders suffocated another squeaky sound and bit his lower lip over the very cute action. He just couldn't help it, his brain found it overly adorable and he just wanted more of it. But he shook his head as to clear it and pulled himself back to the question, finding it very hard to keep his focus on just one thing and not a hundred things. 

He focused on the touch, touching felt so much more, not just a thing people accidentally did, but like words, like every touch meant something. When Fenris brushed his fingers along his fin or body it meant something, Fenris was telling him things even without speaking. Things that Anders somehow understood but couldn't translate into... well, actual spoken words, as if there was a spectra of words he never had understood. 

When Anders touched Fenris, little strokes of his tail whenever he managed to do it as he wanted, when he placed both his hands happily against Fenris' chest, _he_ was saying something. He wasn't always entirely certain what it was he was saying, but he knew Fenris' understood because he himself understood, even if he couldn't translate it into words. 

He suddenly couldn't understand how he had lived his life, understanding people without touching them. How did they understand each other at all with just words and at times a handshake? What had made sense to him this morning was so incomplete for him now.

"Touching... it's like... speaking." Anders said and smiled at Fenris who squeezed his hand slightly. The equivalent of yes in this case, yes and pride?

Fenris nodded and smiled back at him. "Yes. Touching is part of our language, it isn't something one does with only those closest, we touch everyone. It's how things work." Fenris explained to him.

"I think I understand. Humans, we don't... well, touch doesn't feel like this for us. It's just... touches." He tried to explain but it felt so hollow. "I like this better." 

He laughed lightly and shook his head before pulling Fenris in for a close hug instead. He was bored of talking anyway, just wanted to cuddle Fenris and learn more new things. Fenris in turn chuckled and hugged him back, tail wrapped around Anders' own once again. 

Getting back to the surface could wait, he had an ocean to explore with the man he loved.

**Author's Note:**

> Look you made it! :) Good on you! And thank you! *hands out a cookie* 
> 
> Kudos and comments are as always appreciated, keeps me writing and very often inspires what I am writing. :)
> 
> You can find me on tumblr if you need me! :) http://isalahadow.tumblr.com/


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